Katlandia

Painting a day - Day 4 - another angel

2011-06-30T18:47:00.000-07:00

Painting a day: Day 4 - another angel
I default to angels and mermaids and fairies.. and girly stuff ^_^ when I am warming up, practicing a technique, or doodling. This one was a quickie on canvas paper, I used prismacolors, watercolor pencils, and acrylics.

Painting a day - Day 3 - Lost & Found Carousel Girl

2011-06-29T08:00:00.000-07:00

Found

mixed media on canvas paper

Painting - a -day : Day 3 - Lost and Found Carousel Girl.

This is the painted study for the companion piece to Waiting but I think I would like her better if she were flipped and facing left. (And there is something about her hair I'm just not feeling) I also like the idea of doing a whole bunch of these girls in different colors, with different carousel animals. I'm just digging the carousel theme too much- my sketchbook is full of them.

Painting a day - Day 2 - digital offerings

2011-06-26T22:06:00.000-07:00

Day 2 - digital offerings

These are the results of messing around with photoshop. I like the image, and I like that I created all the elements- the paintings are all mine, the textures are 100% mine, even the book page snippets are mine. I scanned/painted/digitally collaged everything. Its a lot of work (!) not using prefab brushes/filters/textures/shapes. I'm not sure where to take these, besides using the one as personal notepaper, but I made them.

Painting a day - Day 1- Portrait of Keian

2011-06-26T21:28:00.000-07:00

Shame on me, I've never painted a portrait of my baby, my 2-year-old son Keian.

So to start off this whole painting experiment - I painting this quick acrylic piece of him. Lots of thin washes built up wet into wet. Something like working with watercolor of goache.
I'm starting a painting a day because I herniated 2 disks in my lower back and I'm stuck at home.

I'm committing to making a piece of art a day to keep myself busy, or else my brain will turn to mush and I will start painting redrum on the walls. Just kidding...maybe.

Waiting - Carousel Girl Painting

2011-06-21T00:36:00.000-07:00

Waiting

Carousel Girls

Acrylic on Canvas

11"x14"

Finished! Scanned and edited and color corrected and DONE! Now to start the fun that is making prints. I want this one to be close to full size, but I can't do that with my set up. For now I will have to settle with 8x10 and 5x7.

Newest Painting

2011-06-20T17:12:00.000-07:00

Waiting

Acrylic on 11x14 canvas

I'm finishing up this piece (Waiting) and I have about a million other ideas because of it. I love it when inspiration works like that.

I want my very own carousel, and her sweater.

This is the sketch for her face, I usually end up preferring the sketch to the painting. Everything I'm painting lately is pretty nostalgic; me thinking about when I was young. I really liked the old quarter-a-ride carousels that were outside of stores. What the heck happened to them? They were always so brightly colored and the horses were either horribly ugly or little mini works of art. I loved horses and carousels when I was young. I had the prettiest porcelain carousel horse, hand-painted. I really want to get another and paint it, or make my own out of paper mache and paper clay, hrm, never enough hours in the day.

Finished! Alice in Wonderland Painting, Alice's Favorite Necklace

2011-06-17T14:40:00.000-07:00

Alice's Favorite Necklace
9" x 9" Canvas, 2 2/3" deep sides

Growing up, in the 80s, I really liked The Black Cauldron and The Last Unicorn, Labyrinth, and The Dark Crystal. Fraggle ROCK! Inspector Gadget, JEM! I'm completely nostalgic for the movies and stories of my childhood. Except, I didn't really like the Disney version of Alice, a lot of the wit and charm seemed to be missing. I'm a big fan of the sweeter side of Alice in Wonderland. I remember the stories as a child holding so much magic and weirdness. I always wanted to be Alice. I used to imagine her going back and forth between Wonderland having adventures.

Based on that idea, I started a series of Alice paintings. This one is Alice's Favorite Necklace; I imagine Alice carrying mementos of her friends and adventures with her topside.

I drew and painted that swirly, ornate background, I really want wall paper like that.

Can you see the Cheshire Cat and the White Rabbit? I have so many more ideas for this series, I'm painting like a madwoman everyday.

Alice is available on Etsy, so are prints!

My Pirate Office and Art Fort

2011-05-27T18:23:00.000-07:00

We moved into a nicer, somewhat larger, home in March. It was a freezing cold weekend and I had acute bronchitis that turned into pnuemonia; I was working full time that week and we were trying to move everything ourselves, with a two-year-old in tow. Crazy doesn't even begin to describe it.
Almost June and I'm finally, finally! unpacked completely and settling in to this place. Inspired and fired up with the Spark Kit in my hot little hands... on my hot little desktop just doesn't have that ring to it... I nailed a bunch of holes in the wall and set up shop in one corner. The dining room has been commandeered and its now the pirate office and art fort that I've been needing to get together.
For two days now I've been working and painting and painting and working. I ran out of wall space and nails before I ran out of in-progress paintings to hang. Cluttered but functional: I have to see everything I'm working on all at once or I forget about it.

Seriously, I stopped counting after 22 pieces.
Photos of the mess? I have no shame.

Sharing the art-love!

2011-05-25T14:55:00.001-07:00

I'm offering prints of my paintings or a custom portrait to pay-it-forward for anyone who is donating/sponsoring Danielle LaPorte's SPARKkit to needy entrepreneurs!

Interested?
You can reply here, twitter ( kat_mcbride ), or email me ( katcanpaint at gmail dot com) to tell me what you'd like.
Want to see all my favorite finished stuff in one place? Check out my flickr to see my painting and illustration portfolio.

Just a peek

2011-05-19T21:08:00.000-07:00

I have 5 or so paintings in transition and I took a couple of quick shots of the pieces I have spent the most time with lately.. They are totally ugly stage right now, but slowly I am figuring out what they are supposed to be.

She's on a 6x6" canvas. I want her to be more deeply colored, richer, and moodier. Atmosphere. Depth. These are the things I am thinking. Also, I don't know what happened, but she made me paint blue mermaid hair.

You might remember her when she was white-haired she needed a change, and I'm really happy with the tattoo.

Then there are battles like this one- a large painting that was being stored too close to my son's art desk.

Inspired by Anahata Katkin / Papaya!

2011-02-24T20:11:00.000-08:00

Halo of Roses

Digital Painting/Collage

This is a photoshopped painting/collage of my paintings, except the labyrinth image, that came from Dover. I've had this girl half painted laying around and never knew how to finish her or what else I could do with her, so I scanned the painting and this is what I came up with. I borrowed a lot from Tattoo Nouveau- hair roses mandala background. The composition is inspired by the gorgeous work of Anahata Katkin.

Anahata is one of my artist/designer crushes. When I grow up I'd like to have a freakin' awesome inspiring art bizz like Papaya! I'm always wowed by everything the Papaya team does, especially anything paper. I'm a wrapping paper & stationary & office supplies nut-especially when its pretty-pretty.

detail view: layers texture layers color layers!

New Work: Pink Rainbow Carousel

2011-02-20T19:22:00.001-08:00

Pink Rainbow Carousel
Color study
Acrylics and photoshop

I painted the girl on her horse with golden fluid acrylics then I scanned and edited the background and added the frame in photoshop. I love playing with layers and colors trying to keep the same luminosity digitally that I create with paint. This is a fun study for a finished painting, I really like the framed piece, it would be even more awesome with a gold leaf frame on a wood plaque.

Work I'm totally into right now - with a preview!

2011-02-15T19:02:00.000-08:00

Immersed in all things girly, colorful, and fun, but I avoided the magenta while painting this piece. She's still in progress, to be finished this week and: I love it! I love it! I want to paint 1,000,000 more girls like this.
I added the frame ( from Dover) for the preview but I really like it - now I'm thinking about adding one in the final piece.

Hmmmm!

Think think think.
Do I add a frame and a stripey rainbow background?

A Lolita Valentine

2011-02-07T19:59:00.001-08:00

Love Birds
Acrylic on paper
9"x12"

I do these cutsey little girl paintings when I am testing out a technique. They are sweet and smaller than the pieces that I have been working on, and so quick to do... comparatively. Whenever I get stuck or too into a painting to 'mess it up' I step back and paint something pretty and frivolous and silly and fun. Usually I'm nailing an idea or a technique or I'm experimenting with color and its safe, and I don't feel like I am going to ruin a larger piece I've been working on for months. Which is a silly notion anyway.
I also like them because I can share them. At 9x12" these pieces on paper fit almost perfectly on my scanner, where as the 18x24 pieces need to be photographed and I can't share them.
This one just turned into what it is now. It started out as a girl, then there were birds, then there was pink and hearts and lace and now its completely different. Its super pink lolita valentine. I like it.

I have Unicorns on the brain.

2011-02-04T21:52:00.001-08:00

My Little Unicorn
Acrylic on Canvas
9"x12"

I have drawn and painted this image, girl + unicorn, in so many different ways. I still haven't exorcised it from my mind. I was thinking about the medieval maiden and unicorn tapestry and classic fairytales and my little ponies. There will be another incarnation of this, I will keep at it until it feels right.

Things I learned from my two new favorite paintings.

2011-02-04T21:32:00.000-08:00

Tattooed Muse
Acrylic on Canvas
8"x10"

Have I ever mentioned that I am total crap at naming my personal pieces? This one is my favorite, she is my muse. She embodies everything I have been considering painting concept and technique-wise.
I'm thinking about saturated colors, flowers, energy, patterns, tattoos, art nouveau influences, and things with wings. I'm always thinking about the differences between holding on and letting go, both physically and emotionally. I'm perfecting my girls, my expressions, my faces. Sometimes I see little glimpses while I am painting- that perfect face, that perfect curve to her lips, and I'm still painting because I'm not there yet.

Angel of Sunset
Acrylic on Paper
9"x12"

I love painting flowers + girls + feathers. I bought myself a 10-pack of Golden Fluid Acrylics, and I love them. I love the fluid consistency and I love how pure and bright they are, even when I mix them. My work is bright and intense now. They dry fast, but holy moly, a dab of paint goes far with these guys.
Sometimes I really want to paint something pretty, without all the big ideas and big technique I cram into my other pieces. The balance for me is somewhere in between these two pieces, between something challenging and something effortless, big ideas and big fun. The more I paint, the more I know.

Its been a while, hasn't it?

2011-02-04T20:55:00.000-08:00

In the time between my last post and now I've had an entire gallery show, moved to a new state, and painted more than I've ever painted. I really feel like I've grown as an artist/painter. Every piece presents all these little problems to solve. Sometimes I look back later and I'm amazed that I was the person who created this piece. Sometimes everything clicks.

This is my favorite piece from the gallery show I did. I can see all the growth from a year and a half of painting there in one piece. I'm amazed.

I'm always drawing and painting faces, always perfecting expressions. Sometimes I can look back and remember the lessons I learned with each piece, looking back I can see the inspiration behind these pieces.

I'm always experimenting... and experimenting some more.

2010 was an incredible year of productivity and growth. It may be February, but I am hoping to continue with that energy for all of 2011.

Teething, arg

2009-07-20T12:26:00.000-07:00

So the little man is a drooling cranky monster baby. It is impossible to get any painting done at all! Poor guy is completely miserable; can't eat, can't sleep... his whole word is crying and drooling. Where did my happy baby go?

I had a couple holiday pieces planned and a few little surprise paintings-one day I'll get them done! Right now I am working a tiny bit at a time, its like a Zen exercise... a painting one stroke a day... without the mindfulness normally involved.

Etsy Treasury!

2009-07-15T09:40:00.000-07:00

Chrisy from Sophism Press has featured my painting in an Etsy Treasury. (Protecting)
Being a complete Etsy-newb I didn't even know how to make these. But they look like fun! It's a giant fun mosaic wish list of Etsy items!

Click to get to the full Treasury!

3 months!

2009-07-14T16:24:00.000-07:00

Happy 3 months little elf baby!
You'll look at these photos soon enough, and know just what dorks mommy and daddy really are. Next up, tunic, sword, and shield. So you can be a proper elf baby!
Grandma and I made that green Link-hat out of a green scarf I had. Its one size fits all, I can wear it! Daddy thinks I look super-duper silly in it. We also made a striped guitar plushie, its perfect sized for your right now! I haven't stuffed it yet, because I want to get the right stuff, in case you rip it apart or something. Choking on stuffing = bad times.

You drool all over the place now, and chew on everything. You've found your hands, so now every time you see your fists, you put them in your mouth. No, not one at a time. You see one, and then try to fit BOTH in your mouth. Then you slobber everywhere. Fun times! Now you are very cranky at night, fussy and crying for seemingly no reason. You have a hard time eating, you just chew on the nipple and then cry. You have trouble getting to sleep at night, and then you have trouble staying asleep. Sometimes we look at you whimpering and flailing in your sleep and wonder what could be the problem. Nightmares? Gas? We think you are teething, at three months, teething. Ah, what a special hell this will be. My poor little elf-baby. At least you are happy to see me in the morning.

You get one nice long nap during the day and then its play time. You hate tummy time. It makes you yell and scream and fake-cry. We call it fake crying because its more like a drawn out whine. We don't think you'll ever roll over again, or learn to crawl. You don't like laying down on your back or tummy. You want to sit straight up or stand. Maybe you'll skip crawling and just start walking.
I can't imagine the trouble you'll get into.

love,
Mommy

Sketches of Selena

2009-07-13T08:17:00.000-07:00

Sketches of Selena (nickname: Nener) and one squid (not Nener.)
From 2 pages in my sketchbook, consolidated into one. I was supposed to be drawing a caricature of her, but painted that portrait instead... Some of these sketches are parodies of more famous artist's styles, but I'm not sure that is very apparent now.

Tattoo portrait - Selena

2009-07-09T05:31:00.000-07:00

Tattoo portrait - Selena
Acrylic on wood

My friend Selena has everything I could ever want in a chest-piece: A skull, a Day of the Dead SUGAR Skull no less, cup cakes!, roses, lollipops, sprinkles, hearts, ice cream cones... I have a bit of tattoo envy. And I love love love tattoos. I have one, a gorgeous rose on my back, and would love a million-an-a-half more... But money, and a job that would certainly not allow my dreams of Circus-sideshow style tattoo-dom, cut my dreams short. Which is fine, because I keep doing all these fun tattoo - portrait paintings. And living vicariously through my friends.

more realistic, less realistic

2009-07-08T05:17:00.000-07:00

Sleepy eyes
I like this one, heavily referenced from a photograph. Acrylic on paper.

Underwater
Her whole shoulder/torso/body perspective is very unflattering, and I also tried a purple-pink skin tone thing that didn't work out. Acrylic on paper

Onward!

Little studies on little pages

2009-07-07T04:42:00.000-07:00

Quick & dirty little studies for (maybe) larger pieces. I like to make a mess with paint after sketching to figure out composition and colors. (I like to make a mess with paint, period.) In all honesty, they are sort of like paint-sketches, or is that the definition of a study?
They are acrylic, karat liqua, and crayon on book pages. Farmer Boy, if you wanted to know. Scandalized at first by the idea of trashing books, I just sort of realized I could start with books that were already falling apart.

Etsy!!

2009-07-06T04:40:00.001-07:00

I did it I did it I did it! I did it~ whew! I listed two of my original paintings on Etsy.

Oy! I know, everyone is on Etsy. Listen, I've been thinking about doing this since 2006 or so, set up my name in 2007. Here it is 2009... and I finally listed two of my paintings!
I always just paint for myself, especially now, but I am already out of space to hang and store all of my pieces. I seriously have no more room, my poor shelves are a cluttered mess, and what is worse, a lot of my paintings are living in drawers, hidden, stacked on one another. I'd like for my girls to get out there in the world and have new, loving homes, so I can paint more.

I'm always so scared of putting myself out there, but I gave birth (!!I'm a super hero, now I can do anything!!), surely I can list a couple paintings on the internet.
What a thrill! What a relief.
So far I've only listed two: Protecting and Storybook Mermaid. Very affordable originals, 11X14 for just $45.00.

Etsy: Your place to buy & sell all things handmade
Katlandia.etsy.com

Two Finished!

2009-07-04T06:26:00.001-07:00

Shooting Stars Tattoo
Acrylic on a wood oval plaque, about 5"x 7"
I love the retro style of this girl, and the color purple! I think I might do more. She's a big favorite right now.

Luna Moths
Pencil and acrylic wash on wood
TINY!
This was the study for the huge painting in the tea party post. But I really love this one so much more.

The Gourd Girl

2009-07-01T21:25:00.000-07:00

My major in college was Illustration, but everyone was required to take a semester long 3-d class. While everyone was working with wood, I brought in a tote full of gourds. Wait- let me start at the beginning. Listen: growing up I hated gourds! My mom would try for mother-daughter bonding time, with gourd crafts. Oh, how I hated gourds! What teenage girl, artist even, wants to work with a medium that you have to scrub mold off of before you can even begin to work with it? That was a big NO thanks, I'll be in Katlandia, drawing mermaids and fairies. Still, I decided to work with gourds for my college project, due mainly to the fact that I had gourds around the house, wood... not so much. And my professors loved the project, and told me gourds were definitely the way to go, for me. But.. but, the whole MOLD issue, not to mention the need for a really good dust mask if you are opening those babies up, and a small aresenal of power tools.. oh no thank you. I'll be in Katlandia, drawing pretty girls with butterflies.
Still, every Christmas my mother did a local art fair, and I would always make a bunch of holiday gourds to sell. And I was showing up at the local Gourd Show to buy gourds, and mingle with gourd growers and enthusiasts. (Can you imagine? These people wear GOURD HATS!) And I was painting, carving, weaving, and sculpting on more and more pieces. Which led to entering gourd pieces in art contests, which led to placing, which led to big pink rosettes that said, 'Judges Choice!" and "First Place!" Which led to my gourd work being in galleries. Which led to people only remebering me for the work I did, "Oh hey, aren't you that Gourd Girl?"
The entire time I'm trying to convince myself, that really, I'm not all that into gourds.
Oh, but how I love sculpting. And isn't it convienent when you have a nice, all natural, armature just sitting about?
Oh dear, I really think I might be that gourd girl.
I don't really share too much of the gourd work I do here, because this is Katlandia, home of mermaids and fairies and whimsical paintings of girls with birds and butterflies and flowers. Not gourdlandia, home of all the other things I do... but they keep sneaking in here and there. Gourds are tricky little things, yes they are. I'll start with the Santas. After years and years of doing holiday shows, I just make Santas without a sketch before hand. Straight from my head to the gourd.
This guy's photo looks kind of like a mug shot... whoops. Please excuse the cell phone pictures! He's sculpted with hand-made paper mache pulp, paper clay, and polymer clay on a banana gourd

Another banana gourd, and a Tenessee spinner make the base for this Santa, he is sculpted with polymer clay, then painted. His hat is fully sculpted, but I only have a decent picture of his front. >_<;; yarg! He's my workshop Santa, making toys for Christmas. (I even sculpted that little candy cane in his pocket)

Here is a group shot of the last three. I love that other Santa's expression. You can't really ever get tired of painting Santa, you can change his face in so many ways and everyone still understands who it is. He is made with a banana gourd, Tenessee spinner, and sculpted with polymer clay.

And here is a better picture of the blue and teal polka-dotted Santa ornament.
I really enjoy using nontradition colors, years of straight red and white Santas gets super old!
His face is sculpted with handmade paper mache pulp, it really makes him look ancient!

I have a lot more I can share, you start the Christmas season early in the crafting world! By the time Christmas rolls around I need a nap!

Mad Tea Party

2009-06-27T08:03:00.000-07:00

Somewhere in Katlandia an entire group of characters live in a mint green house. They have been waiting since last year for another mad tea party.

The painting is so large, in fact, that it hasn't been able to be seen until today. She's waited and waited and waited to be introduced into the world.

I made a tea pot especially for the occasion, because I don't have my own. (Out of gourd, of course!)

I do, however, own a tea cup, mug, and saucer.

Everyone can share! I have a lovely flower tea...
Would you like a cup?

Or two?

How do you take yours? With Cheshire or without?

Getting here is sort of difficult. There is an enchanted forest you have to travel through, just to get to the mint green house in Katlandia.

It is dense and humid, it will *wreck* your perfectly styled hair.

Dangerous creatures lurk around every branch.

Or maybe not so dangerous, just your friendly neighborhood floating Cheshire cat head. These guys give terrible directions, and don't care at all about the frizz situation. You wanted to get to the Mad Tea Party you say? Eat some of this mushroom.

Yeah, I wasn't born yesterday, buddy. Would you trust a cat with a grin like that? Oh well...

Well, what do you know. The crazy cat was right.

Tea party time!

I hope you enjoyed your little stay here in Katlandia! Be sure to watch out for crazy Cheshire cats as you are traveling to other bloglands, you never know if they are going to trick ya.

Thank you Miss V for hosting such a fun event. ^_^ I love being silly.

A vacation to Georgia stole my brain

2009-06-24T22:29:00.000-07:00

The drive to Georgia from Florida is always enjoyable because of the beautiful landscape.

The clouds were white and fluffy floating in an impossibly blue sky. The trees and grass were miles of bright green set against this perfect backdrop, everything was like something out of a movie.
The sky just seemed to go on forever.

I took all these photographs from the window of a moving vehicle, they are all like captured landscape paintings, colors so gorgeously saturated that they seem fake.

I didn't alter the pictures at all, the grass and trees looked like they were glowing green in real life, too.

I spent almost an entire week preparing, for the trip... and then I needed a couple of days to unwind. Vacations are supposed to be relaxing, or so I've heard, but I was taking a two-month-old and a lot had to be coordinated.
I was in charge of photography, which worked out great because I like being behind the camera. I took over 600 pictures during the three and a half days we spent away from home.
I took a lot of photos at night, and the camera setting did fun things with the light.

Like this one that looks like a time-lapse light show.

The twilight setting on the camera I was using caused this effect, its magical, and looks like a cloud of glittering fairies.

The camera effect and lighting make the water look like it is on fire, a really nifty and unexpected find.

It was blistering hot outside so the water was warm enough to feel like bath water, but most of our vacation was spent in the pool. Because of the Solstice the sun didn't set until almost 9:00pm.

The sunlight literally sparkled off of the surface of the water.

Family, food, and fun, what better way to spend Father's day? Such a fitting start to summer.

Dear Keian, 2.5 months

2009-06-24T16:03:00.000-07:00

Hey little-little. My sweet elf baby. Can you believe it? A little more than two weeks and you will be three months old. Everyone thinks you are older because you have so much hair!

I told myself that I would be one of those moms that would write everything in the baby book: every sneeze, hiccup, every milestone. I need to stop lying to myself, there isn't enough time to write everything down.

You've had so many new experiences now! You've driven out of state lines on our first vacation, you've started your first bit of baby babbling, you even rolled over. We went to Georgia for Father's Day with your Grandpa, Aunts, and Uncle Joey to visit your Great Grandma and Great great Grandma. There were a lot of family members squeezed into those three and a half days, and a lot of driving. You went swimming, briefly, in the very warm pool. You said what we all swear was "ouchie!" plus a lot of BA! and MA! loudly, and sporadically. Your Uncle Joey payed guitar for you, and you are utterly fascinated with all things music. You really enjoy classical music and classic rock. You smile at me more, and you eat a ton. You're a little chunka-chunk now, its so cute. You have chubby little tootsie roll legs. You are too big for some of your newborn outfits already. It all goes by so fast, you know? One minute you were a tiny tiny baby, now you can almost hold your head up by yourself. You love to stand up when we hold you, and you are always wide-eyed, looking at everything.

While we were visiting my uncle you were playing with your Aunt Kerri and started to roll over. This scared your aunt. Everything you do scares your aunt. But I told her to let you go, and you rolled completely over, I was so excited I yelled and it startled everyone.
You sleep easier now, in your crib no less. You still won't take a pacifier for more than a couple of seconds, you realize there won't be any milk coming out, and then you get angry. Your dad gives the pacifier to you now just to see the expressions you make. Isn't he nice?

Our favorite place to go during the day is the library. You are so quiet during car rides and well behaved in public places. I'm glad I can go out with you and not worry about you screaming like other kids. I'm aware this could change, I hope it doesn't. Your eyes are still blue, I hope that doesn't change too.
I just keeping taking pictures because I know you will never be this little ever again.

Love,
Mommy

New paintings!

2009-06-15T12:20:00.000-07:00

Protecting
Acrylic on canvas
12"X16"
This piece is much larger than my scanner so the image area you see here is from the middle of the painting. I really enjoyed painting the mushrooms and her dress. Still trying to figure out my style.

Love Bird
Acrylic on Canvas
9"X12"
I tried a mixed media collage background but you can't see it in this scan. Being more free and loose with paint and trying new faces, I love the little fairy bird.

The baby has been keeping me busy this week, I wish I had more paintings finished. There are five sitting around my desk, all waiting to have some attention but I don't know when I'll get to them all. I'm a neglectful artist, babies are demanding!

Fairy cakes!

2009-06-03T20:13:00.000-07:00

As if there wasn't a large enough cult following for cupcakes, I just found out that the British call cupcakes 'fairy cakes'. (I was also the last person to know about Ghostbusters 3) You can now add me to the obsessed list. I made this cute little illustration after learning about the name. I keep imagining magical fairy bakers making glittery, sparkling, delicious cakes. Like Keebler elves, but with more flair. Hopefully the magic part would make them calorie and fat free, not mind-altering. I imagine they would come in flavors like Rose, Hibiscus, and Gooseberry, but in a non-trendy way.

Now I really want to bake cupcakes...I mean... fairy cakes!

laughing all the while

2009-05-28T11:04:00.001-07:00

i was laughing
all the while
and how could I be surprised after some
nine odd months
you sprung from me
three hard impossibly painful
thrusts into life
you were born into laughter
rocketing here
as if you couldn't wait
another moment to meet
the source of that laughter
you were born into the bright
bright impossible light
of that room
and the excited
nervous voices faces pacing bodies
your fathers perplexed
as he holds you
as if
after nine odd months
surprised you are here
ours
and on your pinched
old-man baby face
surprise
you're so
little little
tiny toes and fingers cupids bow mouth
and I have nothing wise
witty or poignant to say
instead I'm laughing
all the while

Dear Keian, (6 weeks)

2009-05-28T05:04:00.000-07:00

Your aunt Cici bought a onesie for you that reads, "Hello, My Name is Trouble." Trouble is exactly what you are little mister. You had an appointment yesterday with your pediatrician and he said you are doing,"Not just good, but, Excellent." Then you proceeded to grab his stethoscope with you little baby death grip and not let go. You'll show him excellent, rawr!

You are six weeks old now, and a teensy bit longer than before, but man did you gain three pounds. I think its more like ten and you are just somehow hiding it from the scale. You look like you've doubled in size. In fact, I had to put you in that yellow jumper and take pictures because you will be too big for it next week. You are so sweet and chubby. Too bad you aren't cuddly, nope, if you are sleeping you do not want to be bothered by a mommy who wants to hug and kiss and cuddle. Can' I see that you are trying to sleep?!

Sometimes I catch a smile from you and I think you are really trying to smile at me, but then I learn differently. It is almost always a side effect of you passing gas, or worse. I call you elf-baby or little-little but maybe I should just refer to you as Sir Poops-a-lot, at least then your dad wouldn't be opposed to the nickname.
I want to take a zillion more pictures of you but you aren' t at your most photogenic right now, you have infantile acne and if its any indication of how your teenage years are going to be...well I'm sorry. Truly. You look like the token teenager from the Simpsons. You must get it from your father.
We are going to visit your aunts for the weekend, it should be very exciting for you. In fact, there are so many people that are going to be there that I don't think I'll get to hold you again until Sunday. I'm taking a nap.

Love, Mommy

enchanted cottage

2009-05-26T02:17:00.000-07:00

Photography by Steven Randazzo

Robin Brown's enchanted cottage, wow.
lovelovelove
from CountryLiving.com

Dear Keian, (5 weeks)

2009-05-21T22:54:00.000-07:00

Little elf-baby, you've been growing! You were already too big for the setting we had the car seat on. We see you everyday, but I'm still amazed. While I was pregnant with you, I listened to a lot of Regina Spektor, and would sing it to you:

This is how it works
You're young until you're not
You love until you don't
You try until you can't
You laugh until you cry
You cry until you laugh
And everyone must breathe
Until their dying breath

No, this is how it works
You peer inside yourself
You take the things you like
And try to love the things you took
And then you take that love you made
And stick it into some
Someone else's heart
Pumping someone else's blood
And walking arm in arm
You hope it don't get harmed
But even if it does
You'll just do it all again

Especially those parts.

Today I gave you the biggest sloppiest kiss on the cheek. And you reached your angry little hand up to the spot and YOU WIPED IT OFF! No kidding. You wiped it off. Maybe it was a coincidence, but I think not. You are way to young to be doing things like that little Mr. I'm going to be giving you kisses for a long time. Get used to it!

Blog PaRtY!

2009-05-20T00:19:00.000-07:00

Miss V over at A Fanciful Twist is having her second annual Mad Tea party! June 27th? Can't wait!

Elf baby and I will be attending. I have some treats in mind already. Like maybe making some tea cup candles inspired by Martha:

Aren't they sweet? I just love parties. I want to make a cute little hat or some booties for elf baby too. Have you seen the swirl hats from SwirlyHats on etsy? I kinda want one for me.

Or this cute pink number, by Kathe Kruse, I'll take one of those too! It looks like a flower AND a strawberry!
Elf baby can definitely fit into these... my feet.. not so much. Why are my feet so huge?! More importantly why is there such a shortage of cute shoes for those of us with size ten feetsies? Cute elf booties project by Jenny B Harris. Her blog is marvelous!

And while I was searching for more party inspiration I found this gorgeous pink and black wedding reception decor, which I am loving:

(Photo credit Sang An from Brides.com)

Snippets of my day

2009-05-17T18:11:00.000-07:00

The view outside

The last rose on the bush.

Detail of the embroidery
on my favorite purse,
taken in the blue evening light.

My jar of paint brushes
Paints waiting to be used
Paintings waiting to be finished

But those will wait,
its bath time.
These moments go by so fast
already
my tiny baby boy
is almost too big to fit
in the sink and be bathed
and he hates bath time
so I try to finish quickly
so he can be warm and dry
and happy
air guitar baby!

Sleepy baby

A post about my little sister

2009-05-15T11:21:00.000-07:00

My youngest sister, Krista, has a part-time gig as my muse. Or maybe just a full-time position as a very annoying little sister who is tenacious and persistent. Either way it works enough to get me to draw things for her, and it eventually led to me painting again.

See, I went to a big-name, expensive, art college. I spent a lot of money on my education but I was very disenchanted with the entire experience. Its stupid really, because I carry that around with me as if it defines who I am, "Hello my name is Kat. I went to Art School and I hated it."
But really, I was so confused as to who I was as an artist after school that I didn't seriously paint anything for years. A lot of artists have had this same problem, and I just found this quote from Jim Hodges on another blog, Ullabenulla, where he describes exactly what I felt.

"When I got out of graduate school, I stopped Painting because it was overwhelming and because I couldn´t find myself in the material. But I also stopped because I was forcing myself to be a painter because I thought that was what my education had taught me. I realized I had accepted a lot of belief systems that were not necessarily mine. From then on, it was just a slow process of deconstructing this education and breaking things down to simple words. And 'beauty' was one of them.... I felt that I was part of a long tradition investigating what beauty is all about—the mystery of it, the elusiveness of it. So, I set out to understand what that word meant for me."

The first piece I painted when I was jumping back into it was a very odd color explosion of a portrait of Krista. (We call her Roo.) Excuse the blur, its the only photo I still have of this piece. I ended up painting blue over the background and then I put it away for a while to think about painting. Because I tend to do that, sit and think about things when I should just be doing them.
Krista commandeered this piece while I was contemplating what it all meant... and then promptly demanded more paintings.

That isn't the beginning of the story. I have three younger sisters. I've always wanted to be an artist, more specifically a Children's Book Illustrator. When my sisters were very young I would make up stories and illustrate the interesting bits to entertain my sisters while I babysat. Roo, the youngest and my junior by ten years, was always the one demanding more, she was in fifth grade in 2005, and in love with the Harry Potter series. She was diagnosed with dyslexia early in grade school and reading, well honestly school in general, was very frustrating for her. I read the first Harry Potter book to her, and she fell in love with the characters, and absorbed the rest of the books in the series almost overnight. I told her stories about her as a Gryffindor student and illustrated the funny parts. The story was renamed Kerri Potter (It was called Kerri Potter after another sister of mine, uhm... Kerri. Genius, right?) She and her older sisters were always getting into trouble. . They never saved the day, and were always in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was completely goofy. My sisters loved the stories. Roo's frustration with reading and learning faded a bit with each story.

These silly stories and comics were mostly inside jokes. I don't think they could possibly make sense to anyone else, but isn't that how inside jokes work? Like every kid who is having trouble in school, Roo would fight to get out of bed in the morning and actually get to school.

So I drew little comics on her brown lunch bag, to give her a little something extra to read at school. They were completely ridiculous but every kid at her lunch table grew to anticipate lunch time so they could read the newest Brown Bag comic. (No pressure on the artist there.) These two starred all three of my little sisters, Caitlin, Kerri, and Krista, in the Kerri Potter universe, pretending to be Jedi Knights with bananas as lightsabers.
See, silly inside jokes. But it worked. As long as I kept up the BBcomics, Krista kept bringing them into school... and of course if the bags were going to school, so was she.

Not all the stories and images were particularly flattering...I wrote a story/poem I wrote for her called, "My Little Sister Is A Goblin." It went something like this:

My little sister is a goblin.
It's true.
Just look into those beady little eyes of hers-she's not normal.
She has sharp elbows, sharp knees, and rows of extra sharp pointy little teeth.
Take your eyes off of her for a moment
And she is gone.
(off spoiling the milk or knotting peoples hair or doing other Goblin-y things)
No doubt about it.
My little sister is a goblin.

She will eat your liver.
She will eat your liver for breakfast.
Its her favorite thing to do.

... and it goes on. The bit about livers sounds odd but that is what she would threaten to do when she was angry with you- eat your liver.

I'm not sure she knew where your liver was, or what it did, so I illustrated your liver as being a type of breakfast cereal.

After Harry Potter, Roo's obsession turned to Pirates. Everything I drew had to be of her as a pirate. This evolved into her as a pirate with a pet octopus or squid. I started making finished pieces for her, she started being old enough and responsible enough to take care of them.

And now she is a teenager. She draws her own pictures and writes her own stories. She is interested in all things creative, especially creative writing. She wants to be an author. Spoiled by an older sister who is an artist, Roo routinely e-mails crazy pictures of herself for me to paint. I think she has more portraits of herself than any person ever.

These are just a few examples. She has walls papered with examples of art pieces I'll never be able to finish because she claims pieces from my sketchbook and from my unfinished piles for herself. She doesn't take no for an answer. Which is fine, because I'll be famous for portraits of my little sister... and I'll make her draw pictures for me.

Springtime

2009-05-13T19:00:00.000-07:00

Springtime
Mixed Media on Canvas
11"x14"
Jacquard Lumieres, beeswax paints, colored pencil, gel medium, acrylics, book pages, decorative papers, and mica powders.
There are layers and layers and layers of colors and metallic shimmer on this piece. It glows in the right light... I wish I had a camera capable of capturing that. Right now I am still trying to get the scanner to cooperate and correctly scan the pink/peachy skin tones I paint. I don't like the way the edges of the book papers intersect her face, next time I paint something like this I will plan ahead so I don't have funky lines and ruffles in important places. I do like the overall color scheme and the effect of the color glazing on the overall piece, its very whimsical.

Dear Keian, (4 weeks)

2009-05-13T11:44:00.001-07:00

Hey baby!
You are officially one month old, and I am officially one day late writing this. Can you believe that I decided to sleep in yesterday instead of write your letter? I know, I have my priorities completely in order. I refuse to feel guilty about it, its been a long time since sleeping was even an option, let alone getting a bit of extra sleep. You sleep a bit more now too, thank you. Your dad and I finally figured out a sleeping schedule that almost works for everyone... and I'll take an almost because we are working with three people there is no way we are going to please everyone 100% of the time.

You grunt more now, it makes me laugh. You do not like to be bothered while you are eating or sleeping. You grunt at me, and daddy, if we touch you because HOW DARE WE BOTHER YOU WHILE YOU ARE TRYING TO EAT/SLEEP?! Seriously, little guy, it just makes me bother you even more. And laugh. I'm evil, I know. I think we are witnessing your first attempts at talking, or at least communication beyond crying. Babies develop so fast! It is amazing to be able to watch it every day.

My hormones are still leveling themselves off, or whatever it is that hormones do after you give birth. Having you changed the way my body acts so much that I'm not really surprised by anything that it does anymore. I've always had very clear skin, not now, whatever concoction of hormones coursing through me has given the loveliest face full of acne. Oddly, my hair is more shiny, thick, and beautiful than it has been ever. You win some, you lose some, I guess.
Speaking of hormones, I still cry at silly things. I keep crying at t.v. shows. I don't think this is going to quit, I think it just means that it is time I stop watching t.v. I am two weeks away from being off bed rest, two weeks two weeks two weeks!!! It seems like it has been forever and that two weeks will be forever and I have watched more television during this pregnancy and recovery than I have watched in my entire lifetime and I cannot wait to go swimming and sculpt and lift things that weigh more than ten pounds and just run around and not be stuck in bed healing.
Apparently a side effect of bed rest is crazy run-on sentences, who knew?

You've been great though, seriously. You've been driving your father crazy because you spit up... but I guess he missed the memo. BABIES SPIT UP. A LOT. MORE THAN YOU THINK IS HUMANELY POSSIBLE. So much, in fact, that you think your baby has been switched or perhaps possessed by Satan and any minute now his head will start spinning and that spit up will take on a shade of green that is too close to pea soup for comfort. Maybe these are things only mommies know, but I sincerely doubt it. Daddy will figure things out for himself eventually.

I'm already planning your Halloween costume, I want to dress you up like Link from Zelda. And your father thought that because I didn't have a baby girl I wasn't going to get to play dress up. Add that to the list of things for your father to figure out: DADDY IS ALWAYS WRONG.

Mwahahaha,
Love Mommy.

Blue Hawaiian

2009-05-11T14:31:00.001-07:00

A 12"x12" technicolor tropical-inspired piece. Named after a drink, because it just seemed to fit. A lot of the pieces I am working on right now have this sort of intensely colored, dreamy, layered feel to them. This one was painted with acrylics, beeswax paints, a bit of colored pencils, Jacquard Lumieres (metallic paints) and sprinkled with mica powders. (So it has a lot of sparkle without being glittery.) Because the Lumieres and the mica powders are both interference colors, the metallic colors change with the lighting like a holographic sticker.
Holographic stickers = awesome.

Because of a certain little guy I don't really have a lot of time to devote to painting so this multi-layered approach works for me. If I only have 15 minutes then its not a big deal, I can just add some more color or a bit of detail and then let it dry and come back later without having to completely paint over the details I just added because they don't mesh, or blend, well with the the last bit I did... which works for me because I wanted to get away from the flatness of the acrylics I was using and the blend-blend-blend for hours thing I was trying to do that just resulted in Flat MUD.

Experimenting

2009-05-07T11:23:00.000-07:00

face study
Acrylic, dye, and beeswax paints over old book pages

Painted a base in acrylics and then detailed out her features with my watercolor-esque beeswax paints. I like it, not as flat as using just acrylics.

And these two are sketches on tiny spare pieces of wood left over from a wood-burning kit.
I've been looking at too much of Audrey Kawasaki's work, but it was fun to do. I definitely won't be painting manga-inspired girls on wood any time soon.

Dear Keian, (three weeks)

2009-05-05T11:41:00.000-07:00

Hey baby,
Three weeks already... it feels like you've been a part of our life for so much longer. It could just be that I don't get much sleep right now and in my delirium I think you've been around for forever. Your grandpa came to see you this weekend and he brought two of your aunts along. They like to fight over who gets to hold you, when, and for how long. I'm okay with that, it gives my arms a break. The visit was pretty uneventful, we did try out your new stroller but it was so hot outside that no one really enjoyed it much. Thank you Florida.
When you are six weeks old we can actually go into the swimming pool, which may offer some relief from the heat, too bad you hate being cold. You are going to be an inside baby until November when we can actually go outside without being slapped in the face with the heat and humidity.
You enjoyed bath time the first time, it was just you and me in the tub. You were floating in the warm water calm and alert, no kicking, crying, or splashing. You did not enjoy it the second time but I think that is because daddy was there. You thrashed in the water like we were trying to drown you, which we weren't, just in case you were wondering.
You wake and sleep at crazy hours. I thought I had it figured out. I thought I could get some sleep between four and midnight, while your father was awake, when you were most calm. You decided that calm time now happens during your father's sleep time and I get to pop awake every forty minutes or so to take care of something. Normally you just grab your pacifier and thrust it as far away from you as possible.. then you cry because you want it back. Its like a game. A horrible horrible game.
Sometimes I have to chose between painting or sleeping... and I choose painting. This always makes me cranky later, always, but I think it is the best decision of the two. I would go crazy feeling like I never got anything done if I just slept during your calm times. One day your father will understand why I'm so grouchy with him... he gets an almost-uninterrupted nights sleep. (He can sleep right through your crying. I can't.)

You make the funniest noises sometimes, a lot of times you sound just like a bird. I call you Quail-baby. Don't worry, that moniker won't stick. Your dad whistles bird calls at you, and we joke that you are going to grow up thinking you are a bird.
You don't like being kissed. This makes me kiss you more. All the time. I kiss your head and your cheeks and your belly and your toes. It makes you scrunch your face up and you look like an angry old man. Or, sometimes, when I try to kiss your face you think its time for food and you try to eat my nose. And just so you know, your breath stinks.
For some reason you stopped sleeping in your basket. Why, baby, why? You will only sleep on the bed with me or daddy. This means that only daddy or mommy can sleep at one time.. there simply isn't enough room for all three of us without one of us dangling precariously off the edge of the bed. Plus, you are a bed hog just like your father. (He will deny this, but I will get pictures, he likes to try and put his elbow IN MY BRAIN while I'm trying to sleep.)
Still, I'd rather you sleep for as long as possible so I can paint/cook/eat/drink/use the potty because once you are awake none of those things happen.

Ahh, soon you will sleep through the night. I keep telling myself that. Soon.

Love,
Mommy

Getting back to it

2009-05-01T04:53:00.000-07:00

Storybook Mermaid
Acrylic & Colored pencil on canvas
11"x14"
Here is the first painting I made after giving birth. I really like the varying colors on her tail... the rest is odd to me.
I just really wanted to paint a mermaid.

Everything I do is one-handed now. One hand is ever-attached to the baby and I'm literally typing with my right hand... the left is cradling a sleeping-hiccuping-snuffling bundle. He is so congested, its terrible... the noises he makes! He sounds like a monster. Poor little guy.
So I go about my days one-handed. Because the first thing I learned as the parent of a newborn (whoa. I just thought about that sentence.) is that if the baby is comfortable and sleeping contentedly then you do not move him. Don't do it.

I started another painting a few days ago, I have an image in my head I need to get out. Which, of course, means all the other paintings I've started, to exorcise persistent images, are now set aside. What can you do? I just follow everything where it leads, hopefully it will give me the break from the other pieces that I need, and then I can go back and paint with a fresh eye.

The piece is 18x24" so until I get a decent camera I won't be able to post anything on it.

Holding On
acrylic on canvas
9"x12" I think

I've been adding to and changing bits of this painting since I started it a year ago. I like the background now.. not so bright boring bluey-blue, and I tried to soften the details of her face and body. I don't know if anyone can even tell the difference... but I can.

Dear Keian, (two weeks)

2009-04-28T02:34:00.000-07:00

Dear Keian,
You are two weeks old today at 4:36p.m. But who's counting?
You've peed on me three times this week. If you're keeping track, that is an average on every other day. Each time that it happened I thought I was prepared for battle, but it turns out unless I go in full Haz-mat gear to change your diaper I am not safe. I thought this was just a joke reserved for Baby & Me movies and the odd television commercial, I see I was wrong.

For some reason you refused to breast feed after Thursday of last week. We didn't give you a bottle for a long time, hoping it was just a phase you were going through. (Baby anorexia? Yeah, I don't know what we were thinking.) We just kept offering boobs to you ever hour, hoping you would pick one you liked and stick with it. No such luck. It was two days of hell, up with you all night listening to your fire-engine-wail and trying to soothe you as you frustratedly thrashed about trying to feed. It seems like you just forgot how.
Maybe it was just new parent jitters, but I was convinced you were starving to death, I don't care what the lactation consultant says. MY BABY WAS STARVING TO DEATH.
We got a breast pump and now you eat from a bottle. Now, instead of just feeding you every few hours I have to pump every two hours. Your father thought it was the neatest thing for ten whole minutes. I feel more like a cow every single day.

I continue to try and draw and paint, but it seems like you only have two spurts of sleeping for more than an hour and a half, and I try to sleep for one of those. I wind up painting at 3:30a.m. after the feed/burp/change cycle with you. I used to paint all day long and still complain about not getting anything done, I appreciate that free time more than I can describe now. While I am drawing or painting you are in my lap being jiggled to sleep. Jiggled. I know. We have 1500 pamphlets on why you Should Not Shake Your Baby, but I'm sure if anyone else were to watch us putting you to sleep it would certainly look like we were SHAKING OUR BABY. But you prefer to be jiggled to sleep rather than rocked. I'm just proud that I haven't spilled paint on you yet.

You got your first real bath today, because your umbilical cord finally decided to part ways with your belly button. You hated it.
You hated it so much that you screamed louder than you have ever screamed before.
Great. Also, you've been extra fussy and hungry these past few days... what is with that? You refuse to go to sleep in your Moses basket, you refuse to take your pacifier. You will only sleep if I am in bed with you and you can use my breast as your own personal pillow. I tried to move away to get more comfortable and your grabbed my boob in a death-grip. I'm not joking, your hands are tiny, but that just means I have a tiny bruise now. Also, remind me to file down your nails, again, those things are so sharp that they slice right through my thin skin... its like five little paper cuts. If paper could grip and twist and shred through skin, which it can't.

Your father and I call each other mommy and daddy now. I swore I would never do that. You open both your eyes now. You kick your legs out of blankets no matter how hard I try to keep you swaddled. Sometimes I just lay in bed with you and tickle your toes. I love watching the way your toes curl up just like mine, with the second toe under your big toe. It drives your father crazy when I do it. I can't wait to discover all the other things we do that are alike, that drive your father crazy.

Love,
Mommy

Dear Keian,

2009-04-21T03:42:00.000-07:00

Dear Keian,
You are a week old now. Everyone tells me how cute you are. You have my lips and nose and your dads eyes. You make the same faces I make when you sleep. You are just starting to keep your eyes open for more than a few moments at a time. Your dad makes funny noises that startle you and cause you to stare unblinking into space for the source of the sounds.
Dear Keian,
Having a baby is the weirdest thing. It is everything I thought it would be but so different that I thought it would be. I bet every new mom says that. I'm sure I've read that from other new moms a lot, actually. You just don't believe it. You really don't.

It was 3:30am when you woke up to eat. Now I'm awake. You finally ate enough to get back to sleep.
I have a baby. I can't imagine. My brain can't process that yet, I barely think in anything more than simple sentences.

I'm awake because the baby was awake. And hungry.
How can something so tiny eat so much? Every hour.
Every hour he is wailing for more food.
And yet, he lost an entire pound since his birth. (April 14th, 4:36pm. 7lbs 11.5 oz. All his fingers and toes intact.)
I live in some sort of bizarre-o world with a hummingbird baby. Sometimes he refuses to eat, and instead shoves his whole fist in his mouth, and then gets angry and wails at me because there isn't any milk coming out of his hand.
I feel like I might never get the hang of this.
He only wants me to hold him, or he won't go back to sleep.
He has an incredible amount of the softest brown hair on his head. I gave him a mohawk after his sponge bath because he's my baby and I get to do stuff like that.
The birthing wasn't too bad, actually. We went into the hospital at six in the morning for a scheduled induction. The eviction was prescheduled, and the Pitocin made everything work on some odd medical schedule. I had pain medication when things started to progress later in the afternoon and I was laughing when I should have been pushing. He shot out of me in just a few hours in labor like I had a cannon for a uterus. I kept saying, "That was too easy. Are you sure that is it?"
Which is one of those times that proves the universe hates me.
The after affects were worse than the labor, and now I have a million and ten stitches... or at least that is what it feels like.
More proof- there were a barrage of tests done on him, because that is what doctors do to newborns. He had blood drawn from his heel, and the phlebotomist literally had to squeeze and milk the blood from his foot. He was perfectly calm, which is great, except that he explodes with the loudest screams whenever I change his diaper. He screams and screams until everything is completely changed, like I'm stabbing him with hot pokers while dipping him into iodine.

He's hungry again. Right now. And he is batting me away, shoving his hand into his mouth, scrunching up his face in anger because there isn't anything good to eat in there. He kicks at me, and grabs at his cheeks and ears and pulls at them like he is trying to rip them from his face. Then I try to feed him again, or just get him to latch on, or calm down, or something... and he slaps my breast away. Fine then. I didn't want you to eat anyway. I think the milk just fuels his crying.

He's awesome and frustrating and hungry and cuddly. It is Zen-like, having a baby. You are always in the moment. Always hyper aware of what is going on with the baby, even when you are completely exhausted. (And keep forgetting to eat.) I overestimated how much sleep I would truly get. In the short spans of times when I do sleep (nap would be more accurate) I startle awake to check on the baby, just to make sure he is still breathing. I have some irrational fear that if I'm not with him every moment of every day he might stop breathing. Sometimes when I prod him just to make sure he is really alive, he grunts at me, and opens one squinty eye accusingly, and he looks like Popeye... if Popeye were cute.
Goodbye whatever normal used to be. I have a baby now.

February?

2009-03-05T03:50:00.001-08:00

Where in the world did February go?!
OH my.

Everything around Katlandia is stuck in that odd sort of sped-up but slowed-down sort of time frame. Days go by slowly, joyfully, and then they turn into weeks... then zoom! February just passed us right on by. A lot of wonderful February days were spent simply day dreaming, doodling, lazily painting, and waiting for the weather to get just a bit warmer.
It is beautiful in Florida right now, cool and breezy. All the flowers on our bushes outside exploded into being, all of them are pink pink pink! We keep the windows and doors open all the time. We can grill outside, its strawberry season (YUM!) and if it warms by just a few more degrees, we can swim in the pool. This is my favorite time to be in Florida.

We moved into a much nicer home with an extra room and are preparing for the baby. Sometimes you just get so swept away with the whole packing and unpacking thing that moving into a new place feels like it takes months!

Only a month and a half to go until we get to meet the little guy, my due date, according to the ultrasound, is now officially April 19th. Not that it means anything to a baby, they do what they want. Right now, judging from all the movement, I think its the hokey-pokey.

Miss Vanessa over at A Fanciful Twist tried my favorite recipe right now, Sticky Lemon Chicken, and took the yummiest looking photo. Now I know the recipe I want to try out on the grill next.

Some much needed painting progress

2009-01-19T04:08:00.001-08:00

1. Started this in the art journal. Then took it directly to canvas. Blocked in all of the colors and features, had some sort of idea for direction. I knew I wanted a tattooed girl with a doll face, a little bit Dollfie, a little bit retro Barbie. The background of the painting was inspired by old Sailor Jerry tattoo flash backgrounds.

2. I refined the image a bit more. Added a lot more detail to the facial features of the girl, white washed the background, and darkened the tattoo.

3. This is where we are now. I continued to paint layers of color and detail into her face and hair. I fixed a couple of things with the bandanna that were bothering me, and I distressed the rose tattoo to make it look a bit more faded and more like it was on her skin as opposed to just sitting on top over her. Originally I wanted to banner to read "Doll Face" but now I'm not so sure.
So far I really like the direction the painting is going; the colors, the level of detail, the style... her slightly skeptical expression. I have to do something about that tendril of hair by her ear, though. The more I look at it, the more it bothers me. And maybe I'll add some polka-dots to the bandanna.
What I really like most about this is the process. I don't just wake up and know what to paint, or how to paint it.
I stumble a lot through paintings, trying to make them look like something. Also, I don't, won't, and can't know how to paint every detail exactly all the time, mostly I just paint and repaint and paint again until I get it to look somewhere near what I wanted. I don't know how many other people are like that, but for me a lot of painting is about problem solving. I jump into painting all the time, with no idea how to paint... say.. a bumble bee tattoo. I finally decided I didn't want an incredibly realistic bee there, so I painted two cute little ones. Or, I'm not really sure how far to push something.. like her eyes. I wanted them to be realistic... but not too realistic.. which is basically how vague the idea was in my head. I started with a very flat, cartoonish eye and started adding details to it as if I were painting a real eye... at one point it was very creepy-alien, so I had to pull back a bit and paint out some of the more hyper-realistic eye details.

Then I played with my journal page some more in photoshop; more brushes, more textures, more layers. Plus an art nouveau frame from Dover, which is a great resource for royalty/copyright free imagery and clip art.

I own quite a few Dover books too, they are some of my favorite reference sources. (Or coloring books, I have a weakness for those too.)

Journal Page 18

2009-01-18T22:54:00.000-08:00

jp 18 -Pink
sketch on a tea & kool-aid dyed page.
The pink is the koolaid.
I couldn't decide if that was enough pink.
But I didn't want to ruin the feel of the original, so photoshop it was, and the endless variations it brings. It helps if I am planning a painting to mess around with it a little while to see if anything really moves me.
The pink blot in the middle looks like a butterfly to me.

Journal Pages 16 & 17 (red and yellow)

2009-01-17T18:10:00.000-08:00

Journal page 16
Red
How to Be Authentic: Do what makes you happy. NO MATTER WHAT
joy+love+art.
This should be my mantra for the rest of the year.
With art making, doing what makes me happy, no matter what, is the key to being authentic. To being myself. I worry worry worry about what other people are doing and making, and I worry about staying current, about keeping about. Worry worry worry. Will someone like it, will anybody care?
Worry.

This is not the road I wanted to take, It is not healthy, its not ME. So I am going to write it down as many times as I need to. Do what makes me happy, no matter what.
Even if I'm scribbling with chalk on the sidewalk. ESPECIALLY if I am scribbling with chalk on the sidewalk.
Mermaids and faeries and little girls with big eyes and big lips and crazy hair and colorscolorscolors.
No matter what.

Journal Page 17
Yellow
It started out a lot more yellow than this. But yellow is a bit of challenge for me.
I really wanted to play around more with all the textures and brushes and dover images I have.
I was trying for soft, feminine, and grunge-y all at the same time.
I like it, I don't like it. I don't know.
Maybe if I incorporate more of my own imagery.
It was a learning experience so I'm not going to judge it.

Journal Page 15

2009-01-16T14:14:00.000-08:00

Journal Page 15 white
I have a lot of trouble leaving things be. Especially if those things are entirely white spaces. I had decided ahead of time to use a lot of texture and layers to achieve the white on white look I wanted... then I cheated and used pink and blue, but added a couple of white layers over the top. I thought I would be done with it a lot sooner than I was but it needed a lot of drying time.
I started making a list of things I wanted to experiment with on my journal pages, and then I realized its already the 16th.
I can't believe how far into January we are already.
I'm moving into a new house at the end of the month. I'm having a baby sometime in May (Or maybe April if he wants to come early.)
They say the older you get the faster time moves for you.
I think I understand that now.

Orange and Green Jp 13&14

2009-01-15T16:46:00.001-08:00

Journal page 13
Orange
Which to me is all about fears.

Journal Page 14
Green
Mermaids. I used to love drawing mermaids.

Journal Page 11 &12

2009-01-13T14:12:00.000-08:00

Here is Journal Page 11 from Sunday.
The top half of the image was done by hand, and then the bottom half I tried to duplicate the idea of it digitally.

Sunday was a visiting-the-family-day. We packed up the car with gifts, and drove two hours south to see everyone. I have four sisters, so there was a lot of talking and eating and excitement... and gift-giving. Monday was a visiting-the-family-hang over day. I did manage to get to the art store and buy some much needed new paint brushes and two very large canvases which I can't wait to paint on.

Journal Page 12:

I almost missed the memo that this was a color-a-day themed week. But it turns out I was doing a blue page for Monday anyway. Which I ended up finishing digitally because I didn't want to ruin my ultrasound photos.

I have about a million and a two fonts on my computer. I find them, I love them, I never use them. The same goes with photoshop brushes and textures and all of that. It was nice to use materials that I didn't have to pay for ^_^ Now if only I could get the hang of all this digital stuff. I see all the goodies on my computer then I forget about things like composition.

I'm late! I'm Late! (Journal Page 10)

2009-01-10T23:06:00.000-08:00

I was trying to scan these and add them early. Isn't that funny. Because now I am scanning and uploading and writing late.
I'm always late.
However, I am in the middle of painting bunches of things... so I'm not feeling too sorry about it.
I'd rather be busy and late than just late. I'm almost into my third trimester and I am feeling rather forgetful. Can I blame it on the baby? I'm not sure if that is it at all, but that is what we are going with.

There he is, Keian Aleksander Zane, despite the rather peaceful looking baby in the picture, I can assure you he is trying to kick the stuffing out of me on a daily basis. I'm due in May, so I only have more kicking to look forward too. Not to mention the labor.

Whee!

Oh, and my journal page. Which has nothing to do with babies.
Dollface
to be a fully realized painting in the near future.
I want to do a couple of doll-faced tattooed girls. Soon.
I'm still finishing Christmas presents.
I'm late. I told you.

Journal Page 9

2009-01-08T23:03:00.001-08:00

Journal Page 9: Nest, revisited
I was messing with proportion, atmosphere, and color on this page. Also, I used the acrylics a bit like watercolors. I really like the over all wintery feeling and color scheme, but I don't feel like I really nailed the forced proportion. (But that tiny nest is cute)

Journal Page 8

2009-01-08T13:31:00.000-08:00

Journal Page 8 ; Nest
This girl has followed me around for almost a year now. A lot of times images get stuck in my head, like this one, the girl with her nest in the forest. She has been created in varying styles and medium from canvas painting to a simple doodle in my sketchbook.. After creating and recreating this image so much, I'm starting to think she is a bit of a self-portrait. The more I look at her, the more I think she is pregnant, and the entire image is about pregnancy. (She's been with me since before I was pregnant, which makes the realization a bit more profound, and mystifying... ) Is that crazy? Does your body know more about you than you do? I don't know, it all sounds a little crazy to me. But sometimes that is what this whole art-making thing is for me... I'm just telling myself stories, I'm just working out things I didn't quite realize before I made the piece. Maybe I haven't gotten her right yet and so she sticks around.
On a different note - I really enjoyed gluing all those strips of book pages down. I've always wanted to incorporate a bit of collage into my work (but it seems like its a bit of what everyone is doing right now.) I'm still working everyday, trying to find my voice.

Journal Page 7

2009-01-07T17:42:00.000-08:00

Journal Page 7 : I was thinking about points of view, and how most people only see parts of who you are and what you are all about. Sometimes it has to do with how you present yourself, and sometimes it is how someone wants to view you. Its a lot harder to change the perception of the latter.

I think maybe if I were to chose a theme for 2009 I would choose, "Letting Go." There are a lot of other things that go through my mind lately but I think they run along the same theme, acceptance, giving, letting go.

More on this later. Definitely.

Journal Page 6

2009-01-06T20:24:00.001-08:00

Journal Page 6
Acrylics and colored pencil.

I was thinking a lot about where I have come as an artist. I paid quite a bit of money (am still paying quite a bit of money) to go to art school. I left after a year quite disillusioned with the entire thing. All of my classes were drawing classes so I've been teaching myself to paint since then. It has taken me literally years to get to the point where I am now with watercolors and acrylics, I'm not even going to think about oils.
Sometimes I think I should have tried to stay in college, but I know that I would have been unhappy. I really want to go back to school again, but for different reasons now.

Portraits of my sisters

2009-01-05T20:32:00.000-08:00

Caitlin - acrylic on watercolor paper

Kerri - acrylic on watercolor paper

Krista (and Nikki) - acrylic on watercolor paper

I did these from photos I found of my little sisters.
I like painting portraits, I'm pretty sure I paint faces better than anything else. Maybe these came out so nice because I'm so close to the subject matter. ^_^

I like the way Caitlin came out the best. I think its because the photo of her was the nicest.

Journal Page 5

2009-01-05T13:23:00.000-08:00

Journal Page 5:
I was doodling with some colored pencils and this is what happened. I should doodle more. I left a bit at the bottom to write out my thoughts.. hurray for painters markers.

Journal Page 4

2009-01-04T15:40:00.000-08:00

Journal Page Four. I started out doodling all over the paper and journalled random thoughts and song lyrics over the last few days. I painted over a lot of my writing, because I like the look of it hiding just below the surface. I had a couple butterfly images printed out from Dover, so I glued those on in places... Then I found my Elmer's Painters markers, which are opaque and write over a lot of surfaces without a problem. I started doodling some more and the butterfly mandadla just sort of emerged. I really like the idea of it, so I might end up painting a nicer, cleaner version.

I started to paint and draw a couple of pages ahead, so that when I feel like it I can journal, instead of trying to plan out a time to sit and make something. It is a lot less perfect, but I like the spontaneity of it all, and sometimes the images just come together.

Journal page 3

2009-01-03T12:37:00.000-08:00

I started out painting swirls in black, just to loosen up. Then in an hour and a half I had painted this.
I used a bit of photographic reference for the face.
Sometimes I amaze (and worry) myself; I had not meant for the painting to turn out this realistic, or this nice. It is on bond paper in my art journal/sketchbook. Maybe I should try to paint everything in my sketchbook, then it will all come out awesome ^_^

Journal Pages! January 1st and 2nd

2009-01-02T20:24:00.000-08:00

January 1st: Yes! Layers and Layers and layers and layers. I painted, then painted, then painted some more... I glued a bunch of magazine photos down, painted again, then I wrote a bit, then I painted again.
It was fun, a bit of jump-starting my brain on this one. I think the next couple I do will incorporate the magazine collage and painting. I don't over-think so much, I just sort of automatically glue things down. It was fun, and liberating, and everything that I wanted this journaling experience to be.

January 2nd: Fly Away. More layers of collage and paint. I took the idea further and attempted to create a little girl with cut outs. It feels a little Alice in Wonderland-y. Her hair was the most fun.

These pieces came out a bit darker than I thought they would, but I'm okay with that. It is all about the process for me, right now, the experimentation and the mess.

Where have I been?

2009-01-02T16:00:00.000-08:00

I have been painting, the blogging hiatus was all due to baby stuff. Its hard to blog while you are chock full o' baby and the morning sickness that comes along with it. I'm still chock full of baby, he's not due until May... but thankfully I am well into my second trimester and I don't have to worry about nausea as much anymore. Whee!
So I have been painting, but because its me, I have been revisiting a lot of pieces. (I know.) I did manage to finish a couple as gifts, but I didn't scan or photograph those yet.
Mostly I've been spending my time working on techniques for painting backgrounds. I'm only using very cheap hobby and student grade acrylics right now, for budget and toxicity purposes, but man I would love to get some more gel medium. All I want to do is glaze layer upon layer for my backgrounds, but I'm making do.
I'm also starting an art journal so that I can have a place where I can get messy and not be afraid of screwing up the process of something. Hopefully I can just use those pages to experiment and play and then I won't feel the need to constantly revisit something. I can only hope... So for this month I have decided to create one page a day. I'll try to get around to posting them, along with any paintings in progress, to keep myself motivated.

Just to prove that I have been painting:

Angel
Painting progress

1:

Very mixed media background. I started with canvas and glued down a bunch of random pieces of paper then used a lot of texture medium and gesso like icing and spread it across the top. There are bits of tissue paper and other bits of paper in there. I glazed over the top with light pastel colors and painted in the figure. At this point I had no idea what I was going to do with the piece.

2:
At this point I had referenced a sketch I colored/played with in photoshop and tried to recreate the piece with acrylic.
I used the rest of my beloved soft gel medium to get the blue-purple swirls in there. At some point I decided to give the girl wings... and I changed her face quite a bit trying to add a bit more realism and detail. Now it looks like she is crying... oh well.
I painted little feathers everywhere too, if it was going to be cliche with the angel, I might as well go all the way.

3:
Lastly I really tried to detail out her wing to make it look feathery, and less flat. The floating feathers got a great deal of detail added to them as well, because I wanted them to look fluffy... and uhm... feathery.
I glazed a bit more into the background and decided to call it done.

Sometimes you just have to know when to quit.

At least I found that tape I was looking for.

2008-11-22T04:08:00.000-08:00

No matter how I try to contain it, my desk has been taken over. Half-finished projects, papers, paint brushes, and the various paraphernalia of an artist's everyday life have claimed three-quarters of my desk. I try to keep up, putting things back in their places after I'm done with them and all that, but stuff is sneaky. It accumulates so seemingly slowly, just a bit here or there, until I realize that once again I am closed into a 10" square space, enough for me to rest my hands and move the mouse without toppling some precariously stacked gesso-tape-heavy gel gloss-ceramic thingy-pefume bottle tower. Stuff is territorial. I can move it, but it will be back.

Newest Painting

2008-11-14T00:40:00.000-08:00

Untitled
Acrylic on decorative paper

I've been gone for a while. I've been sculpting and painting still, just no real desire to actually post things. I blame that on morning sickness. I'm officially pregnant, and due in May, and so far being pregnant has been kicking my butt. I think I slept entirely through my first trimester. It, being pregnant that is, makes me nervous and excited all at the same time.
I was thinking more about subtle, soft, muted colors and brush strokes. The scanner ate all the softness in this one too, I really need to invest in a digital camera... or get better at scanning things. I think there will be a series of girls like this on decorative paper.

Also, I painted my friend's dog as a present for his parents:

No pictures of the sculpts yet.

Past work- Gourds.

2008-08-16T16:13:00.000-07:00

This is a small selection of the gourds that I created last year, there are two or three in the mix that I did this year, but mostly all of these are samples of my work from 2007. If you click the mosaic you can see the pieces in a much larger view.

These are all the gourds that I had in the gallery, a professional photographer took some great photos of the pieces for me. Most of the pieces for the gallery were natural woven bowls, created with materials native to Florida. For Christmas I made a few ornaments to sell there as well, you can see one little Santa ornament found his way into the first group photo there at the bottom.

This grouping is of the gourds that I took pictures of myself, I'm not that great at it ^_^ They are the more experimental pieces as well; mixed-media pieces & rims, painted designs, dreamcatchers and such. Pieces like these, and the ones in the gallery, all get taken to craft shows with me.

And lastly here is a tiny showing of all the Christmas pieces I end up making for the craft show season. You can see little snippets of the craft booth in there as well. A lot of the pieces light up with Christmas lights, or open, or hold cards. I design all my own pieces, and never repeat a design. This mosaic doesn't show the 200+ ornaments that I will paint for the show. I get very very tired of painting Santa.

This year I have a lot of highly sculpted pieces with the gourd being used as armature, I can't wait to get pictures of those!

Gourd & Paper clay mermaids, faeries, a mushroom, and a bird in a party hat.

2008-08-15T16:22:00.000-07:00

Group shot!

I had made a lot of little mermaids and a chubby gourd bird and a gourd fairy for Ms V's Mad Tea Party... but then I killed my camera, Boo! So, with the little sister's help, I got to take a lot of lovely photos of those pieces outside. They are all gourd with polymer clay / papermache & clay sculpting, and I painted everything with acrylics and mica powders.

Chubby bird in a party hat.
(Funny, he's pink, but definately a boy in my brain.)
Gourd with paperclay beak, paper party hat, and feather tail.

This mermaid has a polymer clay face, with paper mache/paper clay hair and arms, and a paper mache fin. She's sculpted on a Tenessee spinner gourd and a banana gourd.

Gourd faerie!
Tennessee spinner and banana gourds, with paper clay... and silk flowers/ribbon/and some wire & tulle wings.

This is my gypsy queen mermaid. I used the same Tennessee spinner/banana gourd combo with paperclay and paper mache. But then I made a headdress/crown out of ribbon, feathers, beads and rhinestones and I dressed her in some fabric bits. She has multicolored yarn for hair that I styled.
Lots of glue-gun action for this.

Two views of my gourd mushroom. I made it from a banana gourd (notice a trend? ^_^) and a scrap gourd piece. It was painted with a very fun silk-dye technique. It looks perfect outside.

I think this mermaid is my favorite, or at least today she is. Same construction method as before, paperclay & mache over gourds, but I sculpted a short hair-style for her, and made a little blue eyelash yarn boa.

All my mermaids are hand-painted, I used a lot of mica powders and metallic paints for the tails, they are super gorgeous and sparkley.

I almost forgot Marilyn, sans wings, I glued them on later.

(I decided on a different pair 3 times.)

Paper mache and paper clay. No gourds! Amazing ^_^

My first Art Doll! (with wired arms, wheee!)

2008-08-14T11:20:00.000-07:00

I just wired the arms of this sweet little art doll I made, so now they are poseable. I'm in love! I made her out of gourds, paper mache, and paper clay... and painted her features. I also hand made her outfit, no sewing because I don't have a machine, but it is glued together with tacky glue and golden heavy gel.. I constructed it like I would if I were to sew it, and glued the seams, thankfully I was using clear tacky glue, otherwise I don't know how long that would have taken! All the muslin is hand-dyed/painted/distressed and I never throw away ribbon/yarn/fabric scraps so I had a lot of miscellaneous fabrics and ribbons and buttons that I added, on her back there is a little flower I made out of fabric scraps and beads. I really like the 'shabby chic' look she has. Her hair is lamb's wool that curls up wonderfully.... but then I thought she needed something, so I added a hat, made out of the same fabric and ribbons scraps as her dress. That part was really exciting, because I've never made anything like a hat ever... its not as easy as I originally thought. I can't wait to make more pieces like this! I want to make a Santa with the frayed-edge-pieced-together look that I did here.

(The blue in the bottom photo is tape, because I couldn't decide on the exact placement of her arms when I had the camera.)

Time passes in a blur

2008-08-13T10:53:00.000-07:00

School starts again soon, which means my younger sisters will all be going back. The oldest of my younger sisters will be a senior in high school this year, wow. Wow. I remember when I was a senior in highschool. Time flies, yes?
Roo, the youngest, was over for a week or so, there were so many things we were supposed to do... mostly we just read and drew/painted/cooked. Roo lives chicken noodle soup, so we made chicken noodle soup three times that week. We also made char siu bao, eclairs, cream puffs, brownies, egg rolls, and more things than I can think of right now.

The most fun was sitting around and reading and doing nothing together... but we also spent a lot of time researching images to paint on her school shoes. She wanted characters and worlds from Kingdom Hearts... which happen to be rather difficult to paint on the 2 inches of space I had on her shoes. I managed, she loved them.

Caitie came over with her camera and helped me take pictures of all my 3-d pieces.... but I didn't know that after 200 flickr starts deleting your oldest picture to make room for the new ones.
I should have known, they tell you, but I didn't process that info. So a lot of the professional pictures I had taken of the gourds, and my older paintings, are MIA. I hope I have the images somewhere on this computer.

I have a lot newer ones to show, which makes me happy, I keep making 3-d things, that I can't scan, and then I want to share. I just make a bunch of polymer clay jewelry for my sisters. There are a lot of pieces - necklaces and earrings, with little cute ghosts and ice creams, lollipops, strawberries, cherries, an octopus for Roo, fortune cookies, chocolates, a monkey for Caitie, a cupcake, a Jack Skellington for Kerri, well I lost track. I made a lot, they are seriously addictive... They are so tiny, and so colorful, and so much fun! I could sit around making little clay jewelry pieces forever. ( I think the octopus is my favorite, he came out so cute. Or maybe the ghosts...) Also, it doesn't take a lot of clay, or a long baking time to make them... so instant gratification! I haven't used polymer clay in a long long long time (I would rather use paperclay) so I might try to make more sophisticated jewelry pieces.

I made shoes for Kerri, with two of her favorite characters from Avatar on them.

And I have more jewelry to make, so I'm off!

on slowing down

2008-08-02T22:35:00.000-07:00

Watercolor 1
acrylics and watercolors on paper
This painting is how late summer feels to me - like being woken out of a deep sleep, where you are still partially dreaming and slowly emerging into yourself, fully awake.

I will sit down to paint with something completely different in mind, and somehow she finds her way into my next painting. I draw, and paint, this girl and others like her often. There is something about the face, the eyes, the questioning look, the floating hair... the surreal space created in the work.... I don't know.
Some images call to me, wake me from sleep, and compel me to draw, to paint, to sculpt... to create. But mostly, it is a slow process courting these images in my mind, and translating them onto canvas. I know they are there, but they want to emerge into this world slowly and softly, colors, images words and feelings floating in and out of my mind, like dreams, the work reinventing itself constantly.

You can choose to ignore this part, and force the work to be something you want it to be, to complete it faster, to push it into a smaller existence because of frustration and impatience.

Often I do.

Every brush stroke is a decision, every blot of color, ever nuance and shift of the body while painting, every thought, every breath, every blink changes the flow with which a painting is created. It is both easy and difficult, and very Zen, painting. It is seductive and sweet and cruel, and everything, and nothing, that I have ever imagined. There are moments when everything is perfect... and then when I feel like nothing will ever work again.
Every single day.

I paint anyway.

It feels that in these moments I am growing, expanding, becoming something more, or waking and being someone new. One idea carries me to the next, one image to the next, one thought to the next... but in my impatience I miss the subtleties... I am too busy with trying to force what I want, what I think is best... As if painting were about my ego.

I repeat myself, little blog, often.
I have to talk myself through things like this... try and make them make sense. I am starting to recognize everything I do more, and slow myself down. A lot of painting is about the mindset I am in.
Everything feels larger and difficult to grasp, and still, I paint anyway.

Holding On

2008-07-27T01:14:00.000-07:00

Holding On
Mixed Media (acrylic, mica, beeswax) on canvas

I used to paint all the time. I used to work with watercolors and acrylics mostly, years ago, but this was all before I drifted into the realm of sculpture and art work in three dimensions, and all the things I knew how to do just faded away. Trying to learn how to paint again, well, it is not like riding a bike. There are so many bad paintings behind me. Sometimes I can see where I've gotten better, sometimes I cannot, mostly it is very slow progress. A lot of paint, painting, frustration, and complaining about all three.

Back in April I had asked for canvas for my birthday... 5, in fact, so that I could start a series that I've been thinking about. Most of my paintings/drawings/whatever live inside my head. In this place we refer to as Katlandia...its the place inside my head where all the characters and paintings and drawings come from. I paint to get these images out of my head... so a lot of times you will see the same girl/pose/theme to my work because I just can't get the image out of my head.

Anyway, I've been spending every day drawing or painting something, anything to let this idea live. A lot of time, this is all I do. I paint, working towards the goal of five pieces, or I work on a paper mache piece, or I work on a gourd piece. I do art. It is not always pretty. Scratch that. Mostly, it is not pretty. Mostly, it is not what I had envisioned in my head. And then I get annoyed. (I'm sure this happens/ has happened to every other artist, ever, in the history of artists.)

See, usually I feel like I paint because I have to. Not because anyone is making me, but because I can't be happy unless I'm painting. Theres a lot of other junk involved in that, but mostly I am not happy with my day if I haven't painted. Is this a creative energy, or spirit... a muse? Is this just an urge? A passion, an obsession? I don't have these answers, I just paint because I have to paint, and I wish I had the words to express that better but I think in paintings and speak with paintings.

I wanted the five paintings to be exercises in style, technique, and simplicity. I was trying to find my style again, the essence of who I am, stylistically, as a painter, as an artist. For this series, I knew I wanted a central female figure, with her hands in different poses. I knew I wanted it to be a simple five-piece series focusing on the execution, the procedure, the method and manner of laying down paint with brush. I want to find MY way, My style, and the only way to do that is paint paint paint. But, man do I ever get frustrated with myself. (I can certainly whine a lot about it as well.) I get so annoyed when things aren't happening the way I wanted them to, the way I had planned, the way I see them in my head. I get to a point where I hate painting. Those are bad days.

I research art every day; painting techniques, styles, media, substrates. Delving into everything from outsider folk art, altered mixed media pieces, old masters, and a lot of dolls/figurative sculpture. It isn't that I want to completely separate myself from the artist that works in 3-d, it is that I wanted to become a better painter. (I'm sure this will help me make better sculptures, as well.) The I clutter my brain with all these other things I've been looking at and concentrating on. Then I want to add something else to my paintings, or change something, or do something completely different. I have to talk myself down from these places and really focus on painting this series, because I think, "Wouldn't it be cool to learn how to do embroidery/paper cuts/ miche technique/ soldering..."

When I was painting this piece, it was all about the series, which exists in my head as "Holding On and Letting Go" It was also about quieting the clutter and anxiety and focusing on painting. It was about style, and technique, and simplicity. Somehow in all the painting I was doing, it really turned into a piece about contrasts. I decided only to use two colors to paint the figure, burnt sienna and a portrait pink, to limit myself, to see if I could successfully paint a person in only two colors. I love to use saturated bright colors, especially in my 3-d work, in this painting I limited those colors and that application to the background. The contrast of busy background / static figure, cool colors / warm, shimmery / flat, vibrant / dull, etc... all came together in little decisions, without planning. (I'm sure that my struggles with painting are a bit to blame for the direction this painting took, odd how things like that manifest themselves while I'm not really aware of what is happening.)

I believe she looks calm and a bit contemplative.

Painting is getting easier and feeling more satisfying.

Dahlia

2008-07-21T18:20:00.001-07:00

Dahlia
Acrylic, beeswax, heavy gel (gloss), mica on paper

I was so happy with the way Krista's portrait turned out that I wanted to try and recreate the process and end result on a personal piece. Dahlia uses some reference images, namely the actually dahlia flower line art from Dover, and French court documents. (I believe a gentleman is being fined 9 francs for trespassing. ) I absolutely love old handwriting, back in the day people used to really care about their penmanship.
I used the acrylics almost like watercolors, building up a lot of watery washes over and over again. The end result was a very translucent almost airy feeling that I really like. I painted her hair an almost-carnation pink. I love pink hair. But no matter how much I fiddled with my scanner settings, and later with photoshop, it seems the only way to get that pink back is to physically paint it into the image again. I can't wait to borrow a camera and take really good pictures of all my paintings. (And my dolls and pottery and things I've been working on that I can't scan.)

Quick portrait on cardstock turns out great, much to my annoyance.

2008-07-18T05:58:00.000-07:00

Portrait of Krista
Acrylic on paper

This is a painting of my little sister, we call her Roo, but you can call her Krista. Her bangs are purple in the front but not pure purple, a faded some-of-her-natural-color-is-showing-through sort of purple, and were a pain to paint. When she grows up she wants to be a Rockstar/Astronaut/Pirate/Pro-Skateboarder. (Or she did when she was younger.) Now she wants to be an author, which is more achievable than a dolphin, which is what her older sister aspired to be. Also, she makes funny faces in pictures. Every single one, its Roo making a funny face. Oh look! A painting of Roo! Making a weird face!
She is also the little sister that I paint the most. (I have 4 sisters. Roo is painted exponentially more than anyone else.) Also, most of my paintings of my little sister are some of my best, freshest works. Take this piece, for example, acrylics on cardstock, painted in 2 hours.

I normally agonize over a painting for days, at least, sometimes months. (Sometimes years, no kidding, years.)
So I sent her a message that basically said I hated her because, "See, Krista, I never finish anything awesome in two hours, especially not with crappy paints and other shoddy materials.

You realize what this means, yes? I am doomed to paint pictures of you for the rest of my life, if I want them to be made quickly and look awesome."

I'm doomed.
But I don't actually hate my sister (she knows that too, don't worry about her). I recognize life lessons after they happen, which is better than not recognizing them at all... slow down when painting, stop worrying, Stop Worrying, and stop overthinking and overpainting pieces. Maybe I will just start painting Krista in every single piece I do.

( I uploaded a newer, better scan of this painting. I'm getting better at using the evil scanner.)

A little bit of photoshop goes a long way.

2008-07-16T22:18:00.000-07:00

Sacred Heart version 1
acrylic and beeswax on canvas

This was originally my favorite painting I had been working on. I love the background, it has an antique sort of look to it that I really like, all those subdued layers of color. It has a lot of depth to it. In my zeal I over painted bits of her face, and now her left eye is a little wonky, maybe I will fix it, maybe I won't.

Sacred Heart version 2
digital rendering over original acrylic and beeswax on canvas

Instead of fixing an over painting problem with more paint, I fiddled about with the image in Photoshop, and I love the halo effect I got. Now it looks reminiscent of an old master's painting. I have a thing for the imagery of sacred hearts, but I didn't paint this with the intention of it being any specific person or saint. I want my next tattoo to be of a sacred heart, almost like a milagro in ink.

Peonies (on Face Study)
Acrylic beeswax mica on canvas

I've been working on a painting for quite some time now, I dutifully scan every bit of the progress of it. This painting has lived with me for at least a year now without ever being finished. I constantly paint and paint on it, constantly changing my mind, constantly changing styles. This painting has seen the worst of it. I had completed most of the details after doing this Face Study, and decided that I had a direction and a final vision for the piece. (yay!) While varnishing the finished canvas, something happened with the napthol crimson in the underpainting, it bled through all the layers of paint; every little struggle, every little change, every mark I made and every decision with a brush stroke is now ruined. I almost had a giant hissy fit. With a heavy sigh, I put the painting away, maybe for another year, maybe forever.
Then I picked up a brush and added random swirls to this Face Study I had on my table, soon they were roses, and then I added more peachypinkyred and highlighted with white, and then just a bit of yellow... pretty soon they were impressionistic peonies. In the process of painting I just got over the loss I felt with the ruined painting. Sometimes they aren't meant to go on a wall, sometimes I am just meant to learn with the process of painting.
Sometimes I have to let go of my art.

But I will be more careful with that napthol crimson.

Lady Godiva
Acrylics and beeswax on illustration board

This was originally a painting of a mermaid. I default to mermaids when I paint if I'm blocked because even if you can't think of something to draw or paint it is always good to just start with something. Anyhow, the waves and water I was painting turned into hair, and there is no tail in sight. I think it just sort of morphed into Lady Godiva. Can I even begin to say how happy I am with her face? The scanner didn't pick up the colors (common complaint, I know) but I'm still okay with the way it looks. Her face! The subtle painterly shading and form, the almost-realistic quality... I'm pretty sure this is my favorite painting so far. All these face studies and paintings I've been doing have been successful, even if it was a bit difficult for me to get through it all, I think I've decided on this style for the future of my girls.
A little personal landmark in the painting process right here. It is difficult to see the end when I am in the thick of it, when there are ten or so unfinished girls scattered about and paint on the carpet (oops) and no cohesive look to any of the ten, but I think I'm starting to 'get' it. (Beware, patting yourself on the back too much. Next post will be whining about how you are specifically Not Getting It.)

Wow, thank you to everyone who is actually reading what I say and looking at my work. I was very truly surprised anyone was following what I write/do. I decided to start blogging with the intent of keeping a record of my painting progress and ramblings on life because I am absolute crap at keeping a journal... I'm not quite sure if anything I say is really that interesting, but thats okay with me. ( I didn't notice I even had comments until a couple minutes ago! Oops!) I really appreciate the kind comments about my work, they brought a bit of unexpected happiness to my day.

Food Day!

2008-07-12T18:51:00.001-07:00

It must have been thirteen or fourteen times that I walked into the kitchen today. It is a short path in my 760 sq ft apartment, but normally I spend my time sitting at my table in my bedroom - drawing, painting, sculpting, painting some more. Sometimes I just get this urge to sit and paint all day, and others I just want to cook. All. Day.

Today was one of those days.

Like most days, one thing just led to another... at first I was cooking a whole chicken to make Ravioli Caprese. I didn't want to use a rotisserie chicken, instead I boiled the chicken in a large stock pot with onions and garlic, herbs and spices... It makes a nice moist chicken for shredding and a salt-free chicken stock. I don't have celery or carrots, but the stock came out great anyway. After the chicken cooled, I shredded it into a couple of ziplock bags.

While that was cooking (45 minutes covered, 1 hour uncovered) I cooked onions and peppers in oil, then blended them.. then cooked the mixture with chocolate, spices, and some of the chicken stock to make a cheater mole. I had an empty glass jar (because I don't throw these things away) and now the mole is sitting in our fridge happily. The boy loves chicken, peppers, and chocolate, so I can see mole chicken in our future.

I did not successfully make the ravioli, no matter how easy Giada made it look, so the ravioli filling went into two dishes; a fettucine alfredo full of basil and shredded chicken, and a spaghetti 'caprese' full of all the original fresh basil, lemons, butter, and garlic with shredded chicken. Both were delicious. The dough that was originally made for the ravioli is in the fridge, I'll make No Knead Bread with it tomorrow.

Tomorrow I will make Char Siu Bao. I made the bao (bun) dough tonight as well... and since I already had the flour, sugar, and milk out I made a 1234 cake.
Still not tired from all the cooking, I made a butter/sugar/lime/rum glaze for the top of the cake.. its a really thick cake, like a Tres Leche cake, so the glaze was soaked into it.

I couldn't decide if I wanted mango with it or not, so I chopped some mango anyway, and grated some ginger ontop.
I knew yesterday that I wanted to make the char siu bao, so I already had stew pork marinating in a soy sauce and garlic. The oven was on for the cake, so I went ahead and roasted it in the oven at 350 degrees for an hour...
Then I chopped it up and mixed the sauce together and put it back in the fridge. Tomorrow I will cook it, and assemble the buns.

I am out of things to cook, and it is pretty late at night. I'm done cooking, but I'm still looking at recipes.
Maybe I should have gone to culinary school instead of art school ^_^

3 down 6 to go

2008-07-05T19:53:00.000-07:00

Face Study 2008
I don't even know what style I want to paint in, really. I can paint in a lot of different ways, it is hard for me to chose... but I know want a cohesive body of work so I need to figure out what my unique style really is. Do I want to be a decorative painter, a realistic painter, an illustrator, a children's artist, a fine artist, a folk artist... Who knows? I know what I like, and what I do not... but I don't want to paint like anyone else. With this study I was trying to work out just how to paint faces for future paintings... I am sort of happy with it, but I need to tweak some details. But I've already moved onto another piece, so the learning process will continue there.

I've been floundering with a grouping of paintings that I can't seem to finish. I'm having so many issues with painting in general; really with the ideas, with the ability to cull and edit and not put every idea into one piece. I get so so so frustrated that I worry and bite my nails an lose sleep all over paintings that I am working on. I hate having pieces not finished. I want them done, I want them done *Yesterday* and I want them to be the perfect way that I have them in my head. And then I want to be able to add every little bit and piece of technique and medium and painterly style into one poor little 5" x 7" piece until it is muddled and muddy and cluttered and a bit disjointed... Nothing goes together, the composition doesn't work... and what is happing with those colors? There are days I want to break my paint brushes.
And there are days that things just work... that I'm not too worried about the finished product, that I can just sit and paint.

Those days are magic.

I've been painting and trying to ignore the desire to pick a piece a part until I hate it, or overthink and overpaint a piece until I hate it.
I just keep working and working, hoping to get passed this... and if it gets too much I put the paintings away for a while.

Here are the latest two in acrylic, beeswax, and mica on wood.

Lush 2008
I called this piece Lush because thats what I was thinking about while painting it, lush green foliage. I wish I could have a garden, but I can't make plants grow. The moths were going to be butterflies, but I didn't want to add anymore colors, so I left them white and glowing like ghost moths. Originally (in the Youtube 'making of' video) the girl was not a faerie.. but then I added wings because it just felt right... or because I love faeries. I feel like the style I've been working in has a bit of that 'children's illustrator' quality to it from back in the day when I wanted to illustrate books. Also it seems I have a thing for that watery ethereal blue eyes.

Cloud Cover 2008
I always feel the need to tell stories with/about my work, but this piece just sort of happened. I had painted the girl, becuase that is just what my default painting subject happens to be, and I was playing with some heavy gel gloss adding layers of color and texture in the background... then the shapes looked like clouds so I went with it. The arcs of rain were inspired by rainbows... they are like little rainbow slides for the raindrops to cascade down. I know its silly ^_^ but it doesn't get much deeper than that on my end, I'll leave it up to the viewer to decide their own meaning.

Newest WIP

2008-07-01T12:30:00.001-07:00

I like the ghostly quality to her eyes, but I'm at a loss as to how to finish this piece. I hope that if I put it away for a while I can bring something else to it later that will work.
I'm feeling a little... stuck when it comes to my paintings. I treat my canvas like they are precious, like I have to paint a masterpiece on each canvas or I can't use them. I doubt I will break myself of this any time soon, so instead I am trying to loosen up on other materials. I painted this piece on some sketch paper that I primed with gesso. After about 3 coats it was pretty sturdy, I used acrylics (artist quality and crafter quality. It seems it isn't just canvas that I have a problem with) micas, golden heavy gel, and my much-loved Karat Liqua paints. (which are hard to find now)
To quote from this article:

Nontoxic, light-fast, water-soluble, Karat Liqua Paints from STAEDTLER[R], INC. are liquid wax paints, containing a mixture of beeswax, water and safe color pigments that allow for easy water cleanup. When applied liberally, the paints may be sculpted, carved or polished. The highly opaque colors may be rendered full-strength or blended with water for a transparent watercolor effect. After drying, Karat Liqua Paint may be dissolved with water for additional blending, or fixed for permanency. The paints may be used with a variety of surfaces including watercolor paper, canvas, wood, plaster, metal, glass and decorative fabrics.

They are water soluable liquid wax, they come in vibrant colors and paint beautifully, like a cross between watercolor and fluid acrylics and they are my favorite paints to use. I've had the same set of 12 for... uhm... like 10 years now.
Some days I think I should just pick up some crayolas and construction paper so I don't hold myself back thinking I am going to mess up a canvas, or use too much of my favorite paint.

My painting style involves using lots of translucent washes and building up layers upon layers upon layers of paint. In this piece you can get that feel from both the skin of the girl and from the background. I use a lot of mica powders in my paintings too, but they obviously do no scan or photograph well, I'm a sucker for metallic and sparkley. Now that entire field of blue/green seems too large. Plus, I just want to keep adding paint and layers to things so I never feel finished, then you run the risk of overdoing a painting and losing all those other layers to worked so hard on.

Overthinking a painting is also a bad bad bad habit of mine.

Party Party Party!

2008-06-28T09:37:00.001-07:00

Yay it is Saturday! That means it is time for masks and tea and snacks and partying.

Of course, I had invited everyone, all the faeries and mermaids of Katlandia, over for a very special tea party.... and my camera broke! No fun!

Here's Marilyn and the Twirly-que bird, with our Gypsy fortune teller faerie. I used my video camera instead, to capture some group shots of the party after my camera gave up. We made Tazo Passion tea, with lots of tupelo honey..

Super yummy! ( it is one of my favorite teas, try it if you haven't yet! )

Group shot! Everyone is ready for tea and cakes!

Some of my guests brought delicate tissue paper flowers as party gifts, and are hiding behind them because they are camera shy.

And lastly, here is the finished version of the digitally colored and textured drawing I made. I love dresses that look like confections! And her striped socks!

I hope everyone is having a wonderful time, the faeries and I will be spending the day drinking lovely (and tiny) cups of tea and making masks!

<3>

Glitter?! Where?

2008-06-26T22:46:00.000-07:00

Still cannot find my glitter... and truly, how does one go to a party without glitter? Good thing this is a blog party, I can use my digital glitter.

Here is a tiny peek of a picture I was making for the party, complete with crazy computer sparkle goodness!
I have absolutely no idea how to format photos for the blog, so I use the default picture setting... oh well.

Sparkles!

Party! Party!

2008-06-25T15:58:00.000-07:00

Vanessa of A Fanciful Twist is hosting a party for her 200th (... 201st?) post. I've not joined in for festivities with other bloggers before I'm never really sure where to start. I think I get overwhelmed by the sheer amount of creative, interesting people who blog. I normally feel like an ugly step-sister going to the ball... but not this time. I'm excited! There have been all sorts of things in the works here in Katlandia, and a party is just the thing we need. A crazy costumed mad tea-party!
So much cleaning and decorating to do... and I need teeny tiny cups for all the little Katlandians to drink tea. Perhaps this should be a BYOM (Bring Your Own Mask) event... never mind that. I need to find where my glitter has gone. The mermaids and fairies that inhabit this place like to steal all my shiny/glittery/feathery things, maybe I can entice them with a sparkley mask instead.
Stripey socks, teensy tea cups, glitter masks, ribbons, fairies and mermaids, oh my!

Painting Progress part 1

2008-06-13T09:46:00.000-07:00

I am totally clueless when it comes to audio for these little movies I am making. This one has an epic movie score which I love, from devin anderson, but obviously my little painting and my little movie aren't exactly 'epic movie'

I took video of my process at creating a painting, from starting to about the middle of painting... because then the camera battery died. Very inspired by the leaves that Frida Kahlo used in a lot of her paintings,

Autorretarto con Collre de Espinas y Colibri, 1940

One of my favorites that she did.

Charging the battery and then there will be a part 2.

Glitter, how I love thee...

2008-06-10T11:29:00.000-07:00

I love painting with Lumiere paints, it is like painting with pure liquid glitter. I wish I could paint myself Halo Blue-Gold. yummmmmmmmmmmmmm!

Playing WIth Tissue!

2008-06-08T20:45:00.000-07:00

My first 'real' attempt at a movie. Part two coming up!

You can use dyed and fused tissue paper as a surface to write on in art journals, in collage, in scrapbooking. Or you can use it paper mache, decoupage, as a background for atcs/aceos... use your imagination. It's fun!

Too much?

2008-06-07T19:04:00.000-07:00

I've been working, working, working!

Cloud of Chamomile
Acrylic on canvas, with all sorts of metallic micas and rich dyes and glazes to get that shimmery bright translucent color. I love how all those little flowers came out.

There have been many paintings and sketches and things going on around here. Sometimes I forget to share. All this week I've been working all on magical new things. Mermaids, and faeries and angels to be exact... and in 3-d! I've been covered in paper pulp and paper clay all week. I forgot forgot forgot how much I loved sculpting since I haven't done it since college. I can't wait to share! There are fishes and new paintings to share as well, still, I only have a video camera and scanner, no regular picture camera! So what do I do? Decide to shoot videos!

http://www.youtube.com/user/KatCanPaint

Am I trying too hard, doing too much? Painting, gourds, sculptures, video... I really want to make stop motion animation films too. Who needs sleep?

When I thought about videos, I really wanted to do something that is like Good Eats, but with art. I don't really know anything about video so it is very very slow going. And frustrating! Still, I am painting a small piece and documenting the process. While I am learning how to use the video camera and editing software I made a video of me flipping through two of my sketchbooks.

It's fun, frustrating, and sort of addictive.

Stills from the video in the works:

The painting that I won't stop editing

2008-04-17T23:47:00.000-07:00

This blog is an online visual journal of the the progress I make on various paintings. Still, I can't leave some pieces alone. Maybe I am a perfectionist or crazy or both. Remember that painting I said I would was happy with and finished? Yeah. I lied. I keep picking it up and scrutinzing it. (Bad, bad, bad, I know.)
It looks too flat, or too cartoonish, or too blue... her eyes are funny... spaced too far apart. Her nose isn't turned enough to the side... and her lips. Man, her lips are wrong. I think it is that thick brown line. And her hair... I could do a lot more with it. Is that shoulder too large? While I am thinking about it... Do I really like that bird? His wing is to big. Maybe he is too chubby... or too blue. I should put some more pink in there.

This is why I should put paintings in the closet or something when I am done painting on them... because otherwise I obsess over the things I see.

And I had this one hanging up... so I see if all day everyday.
So it went from this:

To this:
She certainly looks more focused, the repositioning of her eyes really helps. And her lips look much much better. I added the pink I wanted to the bird.. and he is smaller. But I was not finished messing with this painting...oh no. After fixing her face and hair... I looked and thought, man, that chubby bird is annoying me now. Too cartoony still. And maybe he should be a little more active, seeing as she is pretty static.

So I started playing around with it in Artweaver.
I re-sized and positioned her shoulder and I created a new bird. I worked for hours on that bird. I painted it on like 7 different layers from a Dover reference image of a bird. Am I done? No. The bird doesn't look painterly enough for me now... its too digital. Plus I need to fix the white swirls underneath his tail. And now that I changed the bird completely the composition is changed... more work for me! Now I need to add something else in there (or take something away) to make the piece feel balanced again.
Now that I have been working digitally, I think I may end up finishing the piece digitally. (Or if I figure out later that I totally hate it, well... its just pixels. Delete!)

Of course, this keeps me from the five or so other paintings that are waiting.. but oh well. Maybe one day I will get to those.

I didn't stop working while I stopped blogging about my progress. For my birthday I ordered five new gallery wrapped canvas, and some heavy gloss gel medium. They aren't kidding about the heavy, definately has stiff peaks. I've been using it for everything from glue to sealer.
I seal my pencil on canvas for my rough sketches, so I can paint over it without worrying about smearing the graphite. It also works to seal marker so it doesn't keep bleeding through my mixed medium pieces. I am also using the gel medium to seal between layers of acrylic so that while painting it doesn't become... soluable? again. I've been using it so much I am half way through my jar. Yarg! In addition to sealing pieces, I've been using it to make thick smeary glazes for my acrylics. I can't wait to add mica flakes into it and paint with those. This stuff is fun! I don't know how I ever lived with out it. I also have been using it for inkjet transparency transfers. I haven't quite worked those out perfectly yet.. still it adds a nice texture an dimension to my canvas.

I ordered a pound of paperclay from Dick Blick so that I can fix and finish (yeah right) a couple little dolls and birds and things that are waiting on more clay... but my clay still hasn't come in the mail! WHY!? (And here I was just complaining about not being able to finish all my paintings...) I also ordered gesso an absorbent ground for the gourds... I forgot to mention that in my month long absensce I also ordered a box of canteen gourds from Welburn. (Of course I have been working on gourds instead of painting on canvas.) I love internet shopping, I don't have to take a taxi anywhere. (Shipping is cheaper than the taxi ride to the art stores would be.)

Now I need more weaving material so I can finish the gourd bowls I've been working on.
I made an entire wish list of art supplies I want... I'll have to wait until the next gift-giving holiday! I don't know if I'll survive. Every time I buy something new I use it and then think, "Oh, if only I had _____ to use with this!"

Save me from my self.

More progress

2008-04-16T21:25:00.000-07:00

It has been a while, eh? I've been painting and such. My birthday has happened so I am now 24, and I would like to forget that it even happened. I don't like using this space to list my complaints, so I'm not going to.
I have a couple of progress shots of a painting I am working on. (and that I am supremely happy with... for once) I ordered some art supplies for myself as well, so I can't wait until all that arrives. I did get myself some new canvas and some heavy gel medium.

Progression shots of the painting :

The first piece scanned dark, that background wasn't as black as it looks, it is just as brown as in the other shots. I've had this image stuck in my head for a while. I'm sure this won't be the last painting I do like this.

I can't wait until I get my sculpting stuff.. I've been dreaming about dolls.
Until next time
ta!

Late Night

2008-03-10T20:51:00.000-07:00

I can't sleep, but I do have some art stuff to share. She made wishes on Dandelions (New painting, new title) I think I am finished with this painting, haha, finally. I liked the blue, but I gave her brown hair to ground the piece and airy white details of swirls and dandelions, and swirly dandelion. And a chubby cute little bird. It was definitely a lesson in patience and painting. I've already applied what I learned painting this piece to other paintings.

Here is another new project, my shoes! I found this pair of shoes for $7.50... the uppers are made out of canvas, I paint on canvas, so I painted on my canvas shoes. I made sense to me! This is the start of my new shoes, that I really love already!
They will probably stay mismatched, because I like 'em like that, and the paint is metallic. Yay! sparkle shoes!

Whats new?

2008-03-07T00:32:00.000-08:00

.Me? Just been busy painting and doing those sorts of things. I've got one painting that I keep re-painting every once in a while, I've been taking pictures of my process and keeping a small record of where the painting has been. Or what it has been, any how. This is the newest version. I like a lot of the parts of it, and I don't like some of it. I'm not sure if that green hair will stay.

And:

The mermaid I've been sculpting for the boy's mom is finished. Waaaaaaay late for her birthday, but the boy doesn't think it will be a problem (his mom loves my work! Yay!) So here is a picture for the blog before she gets mailed out. Man o Man was that bead and wire tiara a paint in the hands. I will definately make more, though. ^_^

Hectic Weekend!

2008-03-03T11:48:00.000-08:00

I made this pink sweetie bird (its only one, just two views) out of gourd, paper, and paper clay. Her beak is a bit of paper clay, her wings, twirly curl, and tail are paper. She is so sweet, I want to sculpt a nest for her. And bunches of bird friends... I can also make her into an ornament, so I can't decide now if she should be sitting or hanging. Pink Sweetie is only one of the things that completed this busy busy weekend...

After Wednesday of last week things took a turn for the crazy and hectic over here in Katlandia. On Thursday I got a call from a mystery number, which turned out to be my mum. She had been trying to rescue a stray cat and kitten from her work, and the cat would have none of it. She ended up getting scratched up pretty badly on her hand. That is an understatement, of course, but medical descriptions are always sort of nasty. Let's just say the cat scratched through a blood vessel and well, it was messy. Mum was whisked away to the hospital, and could I please stay with my little sisters for the evening?
They aren't exactly little anymore, but it is always fun having a sleepover with my sisters. Mum came home late late that night, groggy from the medicine they put her on and went to bed.

Yet, our adventures were not over! Apparently the antibiotics weren't enough, because she had to go back to the hospital with an infection and be treated again. Not fun!

The oldest of my three little sisters was at a party and jumped feet first into a shallow bit of lake, and broke her ankle, so now she has a cast on. I believe it was only a hairline fracture or something like that, so she will only need the cast for a month or two. She was more upset because her junior Prom is soon, and she didn't want to go on crutches.

Plus, on Friday! My Dad went to the courthouse and married his long-time girlfriend. Hooray! They didn't want a fancy ceremony, but there will be a big party on the beach soon. (This is Florida, we could have had one on Saturday... but broken legs and mangled hands ruined a lot of plans.)

Everyone is in better spirits now that the weekend is over. It sure was a long one. Of course, even in all that chaos we had a lot of downtime. I worked on a couple of pieces, and happened to bring home a lot of fun things to play with. Little sister number two was given a new set of art supplies (from a random stranger) included in the set were a pack of pantone tria markers, micron pens, and a lot of drafting supplies. I love markers, especially these really nice ones, my prismacolors are almost dried out. So we spent the day drawing and coloring pictures with the pens and markers.

My Invisible Heart I used tracing paper to trace and perfect an image from my sketchbook, but the carbon paper I have left blue marks all over my page. I'll have to figure out another way to transfer the image onto my paper. Oh man, these markers were so much fun. I borrowed a bunch of them when I left, to be able to color at home.

Plus I found my sparkley-glitter fairy ornament from Christmas. I borrowed the digital camera, so I can take pictures of all sorts of things now! The scanner is awesome, but, uhm, not for 3-d objects ^_^

The fairy is covered in glitter. It is Everywhere. I think she is made out of resin. At least, her head/torso and arms are. Her legs are cloth, with wire to pose. The arms are pose-able as well, and she hangs. I customized a fairy like this for my friend's girlfriend, my older sister, and the boy's mom for Christmas. Now I have one left... hmm. I wonder what I am going to do with it.

Now I could only figure out how to take nice pictures with this camera.Instead of being able to take awesome pictures, I take okay pictures and then edit them! Ha! This mermaid is sculpted with paper clay over gourds. I used some of my favorite yarn for her hair. I am making her for my boyfriend's mom, her birthday is this month.
The boy's mom loves handmade gifts... so far I have made her a gourd purse (it is so awesome, it has two koi in blue and pink. Next time I am over at her house I will have to get a photo) a wood-burned cigarbox, a fairy, and now this mermaid.

Free Paper Doll blank

2008-02-27T11:39:00.001-08:00

I love love loved paper dolls when I was a kid! I used to make my own. I was kicking around the idea of making paper dolls again, I have loads of paper around to create clothes and such for them.

So here is a paper doll blank for anyone to customize and make their own. It would be awesome if you could link back with your results!

I printed mine out on cardstock and colored it with colored pencils, but use what you like. Have fun!

Sketchbook Pages

2008-02-26T12:47:00.001-08:00

I am running out of pages in my sketchbook super fast! It looks like I will have to get a new one this weekend. I love looking into other people's sketchbooks, so I am offering a couple pages of mine.

This is what a lot of the pages in my sketchbook are like... floating heads and faces with flowers and trees and swirls, and I write little notes to myself in the blank spaces.

I was thinking about compiling my own sort of visual dictionary full of the images and themes I like to use in my paintings, to inspire myself. But... thats what my sketchbook is all about anyway.

I draw a lot of faces. And hair.

Upside-down Bunny! I always forget which way is Up in my sketchbook, so I draw in all sorts of directions, and on both sides of the page. My sketchbooks are a messy messy fun place full of images that stick in my brain... And a place that I don't have to feel like I need to finish anything. There are a lot of half-finished, or barely realized ideas softly sketched in there. I like using pencil and teeny tiny super thin pure black pens. A lot of these floating ideas get turned into paintings, but once you add color into the mix, the images involve into something else.... The girl in the top left corner was the idea for my Spring painting... sometimes I wonder if I lose some of the feeling or mood in the translation from sketchbook to painting.

Finished!

2008-02-25T08:39:00.000-08:00

A long time ago I dyed a bunch of papers with koolaid and tea (no one was going to drink the koolaid...) and I just discovered them in a box of papers that I haven't dug through it a while. In that same box there was a big bound stack of scrapbooking papers that I bought because it was on sale. Now I have a lot more surfaces to paint on. (Yay for unpacking and finding fun things!) So, of course, I sat down immediately to paint two new ideas from my sketchbook instead of being good and finishing something I had all ready started. Oh well, I can be good later.
I did manage to finish two pieces. Of course they were two completely new pieces, and nothing from my In Progress stack. (Arg.) But they are finished.

She is named Spring because I was thinking about spring when I painted this. I live in Florida, and we don't experience much in the way of seasons changing but when I did live somewhere cold that first bit of warm weather, the birdsong, and the bits of green were really exciting. There is a tiny sketch in my sketchbook that had a lot of these elements to it, but once I started painting it evolved into its own thing... as paintings usually do. (That is the tea&koolaid dyed paper, I used the fruit punch sort. Too bad it doesn't smell like fruit punch. It smells like paper.)

I was thinking about Alice in Wonderland with this one, so it is now titled Alice. Or Tilty Alice. Just look at her face, I think she is a bit more precocious than your usual Alice. Maybe she's the Alice type to you, maybe not... Maybe I just wanted to paint a little girl and her dog-sized rabbit. I am very happy with the limited palette. And now I want to paint an entire series of little girls and animals.

Saturated with color - 2 finished pieces

2008-02-22T15:05:00.001-08:00

I remember when I was in school I kept sketchbook after sketchbook. I would go through one a month or more. I drew these tiny little pictures, floating in the middle of the paper... my art teacher would always comment that I was wasting so much of the paper/page, a 8.5x11" page and my image was always 3"... Why didn't I just get a smaller sketchpad? Or better yet, draw more on the paper.

This always sort of stuck with me. I have a need now, to fill up the entire space of the page with color and marks. And sometimes I think, maybe simpler is better. Maybe white space is a good thing. (While I am coloring it all in ^_^)

2 new scans for today. This one is Roots. I feel like it is finished, but besides that I don't know what I think about it yet. It is a mixed media piece, a study for a more indepth painting. I don't know if I like the brightness of it yet. But... this incarnation is finished.

Another finished piece, yay! She Dreams of Moths Tea stained paper, paint, glitter, gel pens, colored pencils, gold leaf pen, markers, and chalk. A lot of media went into this piece, and like everything else, it evolved from what I thought it was going to be. I am really happy with this piece.

In Progress

2008-02-20T23:29:00.000-08:00

I am working my way through my "Work In Progress" stack... slowly but surely. (It is huge!)

Thought Process Cho and Second Thoughts These are also the last of the wooden panels for now. (I think) There is a lot of black, purple, and red in these pieces, and for one reason or another they just don't feel quite Done yet. (I always have this problem.) Thought Process has a lot of things going on in it that you just can see here. There are girls with floating hair floating in clouds, roses that bleed, paint rivers that turn into pages, then birds, then butterflies. Well thats the idea so far, it is still coming together. Cho is based off of a photo of Margaret Cho I saw in the paper. Second Thoughts has evolved quite a bit from what it started out as, in the beginning it was very bright green with gold metallics. She has no eyebrows! HA, I just noticed. Anyhow, these pieces are put them aside for now until I can think of something else to add. I do this with everything which is why my WIP stack is...well... stacking up.

This untitled piece is based off of the Little Red Riding Hood story. There is a lot of collage work happening in the background that I am hoping to reveal in certain bits, and continue layering on paint and more paper. It is interesting to see something in such a beginning stage, this is where, if I don't like it, I will paint completely over it. (Improbable here, there is a lot of tissue and paper collage under all that white.) Little Red has a mood to it that I like, so I will keep painting it and posting progress.

And lastly is a painting for my little sister Krista, Magical Dream Squid. The caption (if I had one...) should read "While other little girls had sparkle ponies to play with, my little sister would go on dream adventures with her magical squid." I started this painting with acrylics, and I finished it digitally. (So, unfortunately, the hard copy remains unfinished and In Progress)

no sleep...must scan

2008-02-19T22:04:00.000-08:00

I was counting all the Works In Progress while I was scanning. I have quite a few... I hope there are a million other people out there just as bad as I am. I always five or ten different projects and get stuck on some, like some more than others, or have more inspiration for some. Then I am sitting back feeling accomplished because I've finished one, and there are nine others starting back at me. "Finish me! Finish me!" Which, of course, I do not... I start up another five or so more. ^_^

Speaking of finishing things, how do you know when you are done? I never know. I have this one poor little painting that has been at least four other paintings, but I keep painting over it. Maybe I can name it Indecisive. Ha! (I am really horrible with naming paintings, really horrible. Sometimes I just name them the first thing that comes into my head.)

I am really proud of my little printer/scanner. It prints so nicely, and fast, and Quiet. I can't wait to start making millions of paper craft things like some of those from Paper Forest I will end up covering our little desk with armies of paper birds and people, mwahaha!

Of course, this post wouldn't be complete with out some art lovlies: These two are The Rain Queen and Angel Hair (See what I mean about titles ?) The Rain Queen is all sorts of mixed media on bond paper. Markers/colored pencils/glitter gel pens/paint/collage papers/tissue paper/mica powders... and more probably. She is metallic and glittery in some parts. I really don't know when to stop ^_^ Angel Hair is simple, markers and colored pencil on Bristol. The no-iris thing bothers some people, but I like it the way it is. I also love the scribble technique ... Ursula Vernon of Metal and Magic had a tutorial for it on her deviant art page, and it is ever so much fun. If you are ever feeling to 'tight' with your pencils or paints or whatever, it is a fun fun fun way to scribble and create texture and shading. Scribble! Basically you create a colored ground with acrylics (I used markers) and then over the top of it you make little scribbly bits with colored pencils. So, uhm, check out her art. (Or her blog...) Because she is can paint and is hilarious, and...uhm... I said so.

Well then. The next three are pieces from last year, two are from when I was playing with monotype printing techniques, and the other is a painted sketch which has the same girl plus floaty hair thing that I've been doing for... well, since I started doing this art thing many moons ago. I believe I named them Pink Heart Star Girl and Painted Hearts. The names don't really matter to me. I just keep having this image in my brain and I paint it and draw it and doodle it, and it doesn't leave me. Hearts and stars and pink and girlies oh my! It seems I have stopped being able to speak intelligently about my work.

art Everywhere!

2008-02-19T12:56:00.001-08:00

Why is it that after you move, it takes so long to get settled in? I think everything that needs to be out is unpacked... I think. There are still a couple of boxes in the closet and pantry with art stuff in them, but I will have the get to them some other time because I'm running outof space! My corner of the room is completely covered in art things. I was so excited when I was unpacking I found a bunch of fun little treasures that I thought I had lost. I was so so sad when I thought that I had lost yet ANOTHER group of paintings, but No! I unpacked a box today and there were my little wooden pieces and canvas panels waiting for me. Yay! Yay!

You see, normally when I move I end up losing a bunch of paintings... Anyway, I'm not going to be sad about that.

I do have all my art supplies and pieces, but when we moved we didn't take any furniture, only the computer. I don't have a table or an easel yet, but we have a king sized bed, so I paint and draw on the bed... I just spread out all my supplies and sketchbooks and paints and brushes and get to work. Slowly slowly slooooooooooowly we are getting furniture-type things. At the store this weekend we bought a computer desk, and a scanner/printer. Yay! I spent most of the day scanning all sorts of things.

Firefly Galaxies Gloomy and Ghost White

Like these wood panels that I unpacked.

They are around 5x7 so they fit in my tiny scanner, too bad my 16x20 canvas panel won't fit... next we will just have to buy a camera. ^_^